Where in the World is Jeffrey Nero Hardy?
by RRatedauthor
Summary: After a night of drinking with Eric and CM Punk, Jeff disappears. It's up to a small group of friends to find him before it's too late. Rated M for mature audiences only.
1. Chapter 1

All Characters are copyright WWE Inc. Eric appears courtesy the author... no claims are implied regarding any person, real or fictional, and are not based on any events, also real or fictional... much as I wish I could, I am making no profit from the publishing of this... have fun!!!!

Here's A Story... of a man named Hardy..

For the first time in almost a year, Eric was involved in something remotely involving wrestling, other than his relationship with a certain Enigma. For the last nine months that he'd been with Jeff, he'd repeatedly turned down offers from both TNA and the WWE to either start a career or return to active competition. Even Eric had a hard time explaining his indifference toward something he'd once been so passionate about. However, after much persuasion, he'd softened his position and agreed to go to a show. Thankfully, time had allowed for enough of a change in his appearance. Recognition was not something he wanted or needed...

"Okay, just a minute, here... what the hell are you doing, Jeff...?"

"Uh, nothin." Jeff looked up from my laptop.

"Nothing, my aunt's fanny." I leaned over Jeff's shoulder and quickly read the above paragraph. "Yadda, yadda, yadda, Eric was involved... blah, blah, blah, active competition... dot, dot, dot... recognition was not something..."

I'll be the first to admit, for all his creativity when it comes to wrestling, music, poetry, and so on, his writing of fiction is sorely lacking. At least that's my opinion, so it looks like it's going to be up to yours truly to do most of the floral prose.

TWO DAYS LATER...

Okay, me again... I was wrong! That should come to no big surprise to anyone who knows me, but I've been put in my place for sure this time. Apparently my Jeffro has become quite a prolific author of this "Fanfiction" stuff. He just showed me this group, or site, he's been sending stuff to. While I'm not gonna pretend to understand the appeal of it, most of it is pretty good. Although his choice of "rratedauthor" as a moniker confuses me twofold. If it's a reference to Adam, then maybe I can see the fit, but if not, then I'm scratching my head like the rest of you 'cause most of what he's written is beyond R. And again, maybe it's me, but don't you think that for a supposed hetero, he seems to enjoy writing about man-love? But more on that later.

In a nutshell, it looks like Jeff and I will be splitting duties on this one. He can get a little over-dramatic at time, but you already know that, and the last thing I want is to come across as some kind of drama queen. Based on the first few stories, I may be a bit late though. So where to begin? I guess at the beginning. Take it away, Jeff...

"Cool... where was I...?"

"Recognition was not something he wanted or needed or at that point... or some junk like that." Eric sat back in a corner chair and closed his eyes. His even breathing soon told me he'd fallen asleep.

I returned to my, or rather Eric's, laptop and started typing again. Like some other wrestlers/authors, I'm not real good when it comes to computers, but I get by. Anyway...

"Since his release, Eric had changed his appearance enough that none of the people in the line recognized him. To them, he was just another wrestling fan, and that was how he wanted it. The only difference was once inside, he immediately headed backstage. Yes, I'd been bugging him for months, just trying to get him to come out and see a live event. Why he chose this particular one is strange, but I was just glad to see him. Now that he no longer worked for Vince, we hardly got together and when we did it was usually just for dinner or something fast. Not a good way to keep a relationship together, but it is all I have right now.

"Like I said, I wasn't expecting him to show. I think it was Adam who first made me aware by saying something like 'Hey, Rainbow (one of his lesser-known pet names for me), some dude's lookin' for ya.'

"I'll never forget the tingle that went down my back when I heard Eric's reply... "Is that all I am: 'some dude'? Thanks a lot, Cope."

"Eric!" I squealed and, dropping my hair dye into my locker, jumped at him. I take a lot of ribbing from the boys about this and I know how embarrassed it makes Eric feel...

"Damn straight!" I heard a booming voice over my shoulder. "We agreed we were gonna keep our relationship on the DL."

'How long have you been standing there?" I yelled

"Long enough."

"Would you stop that?"

"I'll stop sneaking up on you when you stop jumping me in crowded locker rooms." Eric stated

"But Eric..."

"I guess a little discretion is too much to ask from you sometimes." Eric groaned "Anyway, I'm going out to get some snacks and stuff for tonight. I'll be back shortly."

Tonight was our "date night". I finally asked for, and got, four days off. I plan to spend every minute possible with Eric.

"Keys?"

I gave Eric the keys to my 'Vette. His Viper was in the shop, getting it's twenty thousand mile tune-up. As I did, I heard an ominous rumble. Thunder. Now, everyone knows how much I hate thunderstorms. I tensed up immediately.

"I won't be too long." Eric patted my head as he walked past. "Just remember to shut it down if there's any electrical interference."

"Yessir." I snapped

Once I heard the rev of my engine, I returned to staring at the screen. I think our relationship is going very well, and before any of you ask, no we haven't had sex yet. Honestly, it's not that I don't think it will happen, I just don't want to ruin what we have by forcing the issue. The fact is, I believe that Eric is still a little unsure about himself. I have no problems with being into guys or girls, but as you can tell from what I've related, Eric doesn't like to open up about his personal life very often. Hell, other than the guys we work with, I don't think he's told anyone.

I hate to cut this short, but the lights just flickered. Looks like we're in for one hell of a storm. I'll get back to you whenever I can...

The following morning, eleven a.m. Eric's P.O.V.

Before I get slandered any further, let me set the record straight... I know, not the best choice of words, but like whatever, to quote RVD. It's not that I don't want to push this relationship with Jeff into that area, it's just that... how do I put this... what little family I have looks for any excuse to rat on me. Nothing I have ever done has ever been good enough for them. Not my choice of friends, career, anything! Anyway, let's get onto a more interesting topic... last night.

I ran into Phil at the grocery store. He's one of the guys I actually liked hangin' with while I worked for the company. We never did much in, or out, of the ring, other than close a couple bars, but for him, it's all about company. He does make one hell of a puking buddy, though. So, being polite, I called Jeffy and asked if he minded if I brought Phil back to the house. I think he said yes, but a loud burst of static interference drowned out his reply. We just got back to our respective cars before the rain started. By the time we'd driven three blocks, it was a raging storm, You could barely see the road in front of you. But somehow, we made it home, and Jeff didn't seem at all displeased with the extra body, so I guess he'd said yes.

We're crashing in the den, and the storm is so violent that it feels like the walls are shaking. Jeff is curled up on the couch, a beer in one hand, and his stuffed rabbit in the other. Whatever gets you through the night. It could almost be funny if Jeff weren't so damn scared. Both Phil and I can see it.

"I know you've been asked this a million times, but" I'm just trying to get Jeff's mind off the weather, "what exactly does straight-edge mean?" Maybe if I can get Phil to carry the conversation...

"Straight Edge is a lifestyle that started within the hardcore punk subculture whose adherents make a lifetime commitment to refrain from drinking alcohol, using tobacco products, and taking recreational drugs." Phil replied

It sounded like he'd either been asked a million times or had just looked it up on Wikipedia. And before I go any further, let me warn you... the rare time I tip a cocktail or two, I get weird thoughts and many times my mouth will ask questions that would normally get my ass in trouble.

"What does straight-edge say about sex?" I asked. Having already been disqualified on the basis of what I was currently holding in my hand, I figured there was no harm in asking.

"Some of the more militant members push for abstinence until marriage, but most straight-edge people fuck." Phil squirmed, like my question was a little too personal. But, as I said, cocktails go in, inhibitions go out... the window.

"Sorry, I'll change the subject." It was not my intention to make my guest uncomfortable.

"S'okay. You're cool." Was it just me, or were certain parts of Phil getting a little bigger? And I don't mean his eyes. I'm thinking it wasn't just me. In fact, I'm sure Jeff noticed it too, 'cause he passed me a look he usually reserves for when he's putting on his 'gay' act.

"Does that mean you're a virgin?" Jeff giggled.

Phil turned a similar colour to that of his Cobra tattoo.

"Jeff, leave him alone." I knew exactly what was going to happen, if Jeff got his way, and I really didn't care for it to. "I'm sure Phil has had his share of experience in that area and it's none of either of our business."

Phil swallowed nervously. I'm one hundred percent sure that this isn't what he had in mind when he accepted my invitation to chill. I'm also sure that if there was ever one point in his life when he would question his decision not to drink, it was then.

"My bad." Jeff apologized "I'm sure Phil's had a ton of fun. What girl wouldn't want to run her fingers through that hair, across those pecs and abs, then slowly grip your..."

"Jeff!" I scolded "Stop it!" When Jeff acts like a horny teenager, it just drives me batty. Sometimes, I just want to shake the shit out of him.

"It's okay, Eric." Phil interrupted, gasping slightly. "Go on, Jeff!"

What the fuck... I swear to you, the more I get to know the Enigma, the more of an enigma he becomes. Anyway, I'm sitting in the corner listening to Jeff tell a long story about his first experience with a girl he met in high school. Phil is sitting next to Jeff, and I swear on my mother's grave, he's actually getting aroused by the tale. At least, Jeff's mind is off the storm, eh?

What happened next is eerily similar to something I saw on HBO one night...

Punk is hard. Even to a jaded non-believer: i.e. me, unless Phil carries a kielbasa with him, he's throwing a serious piece of wood. Jeff finished his story and, necessary gleam in his eye, reaches over and gently squeezes the bulge. Phil looks at Jeff, then back down, and even a plebe like me knows what's gonna happen next. Scary thing is I wanna leave. Unless I'm actually involved in this, I'd rather not watch, even though I have had a noticeable lack of nookie in my life this past year. (Not counting my hand, but I'm sure you didn't need to know that!) It all goes back to one night when I walked in on my brother getting a blow job on my couch. It was months before I could even look at him without getting creeped out.

Anyway... back to the reason you're reading this.

The sound of a zipper opening cuts the silence. Jeff reaches inside Phil's jeans and starts a quick rhythm. Phil's face immediately contorts into a rictus of pleasure, combined with a certain amount of disbelief I'm sure. Sort of like Nicholson's Joker in the original :"Batman" movie.

I can't help but chuckle. I know the expression well. I've used it myself the odd time I've gotten lucky when I used to prowl for chicks. It's a cross between "What the fuck is going on?" and "I won't last too long if this keeps up."

It's about now that one of the weirdest thoughts crosses my cranium, not that any of the other things bouncing around inside would be considered normal. Maybe someone out there can answer this. If you have an answer, please let me know... "Is it considered rude to ask for a better view?" After all, this is my house. I know what I said earlier, but apparently my little head is controlling things right now, and it's telling me not to move.

As if he's reading my mind, Jeff changed position almost right away, and while doing so pull out Phil's dick, red and dripping. Oh man, this is way too much for me, but I gotta make it look like watching a REAL live sex show is nothing to me. On the slim chance that I do make a comeback, I wanna keep my macho image.

The room is silent, except for the odd grunt from Jeff and Phil's heavy breathing. Even I can see that Phil is about ready to blow. What I didn't expect is Phil to be a screamer. God, the neighbours are gonna wonder who's being killed? Anyway, Phil releases his load into Jeff's hand and seconds later, everything is back to normal, or sort of. Like nothing happened, the conversation quickly returns to work, and story lines, and other stuff. Between their conversation, and the sound of the rain on my windows, I doze off.

___

Shit happens, right? Well, the shit's really hit the fan. I woke up ten minutes ago and I soon realize that I am the only person in the house. Both Phil and Jeff are gone. Phil is no big surprise, but I could've sworn that Jeff said he had four days off when he came over yesterday.

I quickly check the driveway. Okay. Phil's car is gone, but that don't mean nothin'. Maybe they went for breakfast or something. I'm not sure if what happened last night would be classified 'male bonding', or if it even happened???, but Jeff knows that I rarely eat breakfast, so that also explains why neither of them bothered to rouse me.

I figure they won't be gone too long, so I sit down to wait. And I wait. And I wait some more. Finally, I get bored with it, so I go on-line and start playing poker. Quite by accident, after winning a couple grand I might add, I look at my watch. Christ! It's almost five, I haven't eaten all day, and those two aren't back yet. Must be one hell of a breakfast. Either that or they've shacked up in a motel somewhere...

Later that evening...

Okay, something I definitely wrong. I've called his cell, Phil's cell, Matt, Vince, and anyone else I can think of who might know where my Jeff is, and no one has seen him. Jeff's stuff is still here so wherever he went, it was certainly unplanned. Even his bunny is still on the couch. Looking at its sad expression makes me realize how much I am missing him. Okay, maybe miss is too strong a word. After all, he's only been gone twelve hours. I'm concerned, alright... he's been gone for longer stretches than this, but usually he has his stuff, and I know he never travels without his rabbit... dammit, I miss him! If anyone has seen Jeff, please call me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Three days later, and no one, and I repeat no one, has had any contact with either Jeff or Phil. Some of us are about ready to pool whatever cash we have and hire a private investigator, but how do I explain what led up to their disappearance? You know the details as well as I. The rumour mill being what it is, all hell will break loose if I say anything.

So, all that being said, this leaves me with one burning question:

"**WHERE IN THE WORLD IS JEFFREY NERO HARDY?**

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_I'm not sure where I plan to go with this, so it'll be a real work in progress!_

_Stay tuned!_


	2. The Chase

Chapter 2: The Chase

Okay, it's been a week. No one has seen neither tattoos nor dye-job of either Jeff or Phil, whom the police now suspect is involved in his disappearance. Duh! Speaking of the cops, they've been absolutely useless. Other than asking the same questions to the same people, they've done nothing and had similar results. And the company isn't any better. I swear, one more call from them asking if I've heard from Jeff and I don't know what I'm gonna do.

And before anyone asks, no I don't miss the sonofabitch... I'm just wondering what the hell could have happened while I was asleep. Impetuous, yes, but Jeff does have some common decency. After all the trouble he went to to get these four days off, if something had happened I'm sure he would have bothered to wake me up before he went traipsing off, either with or without Phil.

Here's where things get tricky... there is no way I'm gonna be able to find Jeff and/or Phil by myself. If it weren't for my current financial blah, I'd hire the PI on my own and see what he can dig up, hopefully not in a literal sense.. Here's where I bite the bullet and hope that I don't make a huge mistake.

"Hey, Matt... any news?"

"Nah man, imma really worried." Matt replied

"Who isn't?" It's about the only thing I can think of to say. This is where I have to be careful. Everyone knows that Matt has feelings for me, hell the guy put in on his myspace account... how embarrassing, and part of me is wondering whether or not this could be some sort of deviousness to get with me. I wouldn't put it past him, given what I've seen him do on-camera before, however I have to believe that not even Matt would stoop that low. At least, I hope so.

"He's never done shit like this before, has he? I mean, I know he gets spaced when things start bothering him, but he's not the type to just take off, is he?" The intellectual side of me is still attempting to come up with a logical reason for all this. My emotional side just wants him back... did I just say that?

"Not in his personal life." Matt answered "Professionally..."

"Let's not go there." The last thing I wanted to think about was Jeff going back on the drugs.

"Did something happen the last time you were together?" Matt asked the one question I'd been consciously avoiding answering.

"God's honest truth, Matt... I don't know what the hell happened." I lied. I hated doing it, but I had to protect what I thought I still had. "You saw your brother a lot more than I did. Do you see anything?"

"Nothing unusual. Jeff seemed pretty happy to me. Except for an incident involving Skittles and a vending machine." Matt responded

"Been there, seen the movie."

"But seriously, man, there was nothing?" Matt repeated

Images of throbbing cocks, bodily fluids, and screams made me audibly gasp.

"What was that?" Oh shit, Matt heard.

Think unsexy thoughts... think unsexy thoughts... think unsexy thoughts...

"Sorry. My asthma is starting to act up again." Man, I'm lying like a rug and to the one person whose help I need. Bless me Father, for I have fuckin' sinned!

If Matt saw through me, he didn't let on. "Dude, just get your ass on a plane and meet me at Smackdown!" He said, then added like he could read my mind. "Don't worry... we're gonna find him!"

"Good evening, welcome to Smackdown!" JR shouted "As we build to Wrestlemania 25..."

Matt's entrance music cut him off in mid-thought.

"What's goin' on here?" He said aloud

"It's Matt Hardy!" Tazz shouted

"Maybe he's out here to explain his actions over the past week!" JR suggested

"It's been a real roller coaster ride since the Royal Rumble for both Matt and Jeff Hardy, but what's up with this...?"

If Matt was coming out to do another pre-Wrestlemania promo, it wasn't going to be the same as the last few. Gone was the anger that had fuelled Matt since turning at the Rumble, and Matt looked genuinely sad.

"Cut the music!" Matt said, his voice uncharacteristically breaking. "I know that all of you are not stupid people... well, most of you aren't... and that you know that a lot of things that we do in this ring are scripted. Well, for those of you who haven't been keeping up on current events, my brother, Jeff Hardy, has been missing for almost a week now. This is not part of the script! If anyone has any information as to where he is, can you please contact the local police... Jeff, I know your out there somewhere..."

"Oh, God, he's losing it." One of the backstage boys grimaced.

"I'm goin' out there... don't hit my music." Adam sprinted past the confused production assistants and down the aisle. The fans yelling quickly tapered off when he entered the ring, replaced by a universal look of confusion. Despite what Matt had said, this had to be a part of the show right?

"Adam, what...?" This was the last person Matt expected... where was Eric?

"Matt, I know we're no the best of friends anymore, but even an idiot like me can tell how badly this is hurting you... forget the script, forget everything... and I'm not going to act like I know what is going on inside you, because I really don't know. All I can do is offer you my help, and the help of every one of the guys in the back. We are going to find Jeff."

Adam was also the verge of a breakdown. Matt hadn't seen him this emotional since the promo he did after the Chris Benoit tragedy.

"Adam, I..." Matt was speechless again.

More cheers from the audience as I finally made an appearance. Considering how long it had been since I'd last stepped in a ring, or choke-slammed through some equipment, the fans seemed to remember me. As soon as I cleared the ropes, Matt raced over and hugged me. I was mildly embarrassed and was going to push him away. After all, I was still in a 'relationship' with Jeff, until I felt something wet trickling down my cheek.

"It's okay, Matty." Ie whispered "We're gonna take care of this, but I'd rather not do it in the middle of the ring."

"Okay." Matt whispered, choking back sobs. "Where is he?"

"I wish I knew." I sighed, trying to maintain some composure. Hey, a macho guy like me should be able to deal with this, right?

"Mic?" I took the microphone from Adam, pausing... how to explain this without coming across like a perv.

"Hey, at least you remember me. Uh, Matt, can you please let go of me?"

Matt let go just long enough to throw himself into Adam's massive chest. Apparently, he didn't want the crowd to see a guy who can survive a twenty foot fall from a ladder break down in public. Like the wet spot on my collar was going away.

I tried to look unphased. "Okay, this is what happened. I know there have been a lot of rumours going around the various fan sites and stuff, so let me start by saying that yes, Jeff and I have been having a personal relationship..."

Aside from the odd 'homo' chant, the arena was silent.

"Whatever... I feel no shame in any of the decisions I have made in my life... and until you walk a mile in my shoes, you have no right to speak!" I seemed to stare right through the heckler. His outburst brought cheers from the rest of the crowd.

"So, Jeff, wherever you are...I hope you're hearing this. If there's something that I've done to deserve this treatment... if this is your way of saying we're through and you're now with CM Punk, then I wish you'd just had the guts to say it to my face. I've been dumped before, Jeff, and it's not a big deal to me. I thought you had more character than that. I though, hell we thought you'd changed. But, whatever, man... right now I just want to know that you're all right. Can you please contact me, or Matt, or someone... it's killing me not knowing!"

CM Punk's entrance theme interrupted him.

All three of us; Matt, Adam, and myself watched Punk stroll to the ring like nothing was wrong. There was something about him; maybe it was his smug expression, maybe it was his cocky walk, or maybe it was just his timing, but II wanted to rip his heart out and shove it down his throat.

"I bet you're wondering what I'm doing here. Well, I'm here..."

"Where is he you son of a bitch?" I grabbed Punk by the lapels and started shaking him. "Tell me."

Matt and Adam pried me off Punk, who looked downright arrogant as he brushed invisible dirt from his coat.

"Easy, dude... don't shoot me... I'm only the messenger."

"Where is he?" I yelled back, still being restrained by the other two.

"I don't know where your love interest is, and even if I did, do you think that I would tell you... God, you are sick!"

The fans, even those who had earlier expressed the same comments, showered Punk with boos.

"I don't know about you, but the way I was raised, guys don't do it with other guys!" Punk shouted

"Oh really..." I smirked "well, that didn't stop you letting Jeff give you a hand job in my den a week ago, now did it!"

Punk turned crimson. "I'm gonna get you for that!"

"Whatever... just tell me where Jeff is!" I shouted, finally tearing free from Matt's grip. "Get off of me!" He glared at both Matt and Adam.

"I have no idea where your little Jeffy is." Punk sneered "I dropped him off on the side of the road and that's the last time I saw him. He told me to give you this."

Standing between me and Punk, Adam grabbed the envelope beforeI could.

"Here. Matt and I will deal with Punk. You go."

"But..."

"Go!" Adam repeated, more forcefully.

I looked suspiciously at all three of them. "This better not be another setup." I mumbled, jumping down from the ring.

"Well, CM Punk, you're about to get punk'd." Adam said

In the back, I only paid passing attention to what was going on in the ring. I was more interested in what Jeff had to say. Finding a deserted locker room, he tore into the letter.

"Dear Eric," it read "I know that by the time you get this I will probably have been gone for several days and while I don't expect you to understand why, I hope this will at least explain my actions..."

"It better."

"... it's not you, man. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I do love you in every possible way that a person can love another. You're intelligent, you've got a wicked sense of humour and you always seem to know how to bring me up when I'm down. That being said, there is something missing, however, and it has nothing to do with the lack of a physical commitment. I understand how you were raised and it doesn't bother me, so don't go getting any ideas. As soon as I find out what it is that I don't have, I'll be back. Remember, I do love you, Eric... never forget that! Jeffro."

"P.S. Don't hurt Phil. He has no idea where I am either."

"Uh-oh." I groaned, tearing out the door. He got no further than a couple steps before Phil tore past him in the other direction, hotly pursued.

"Uh, Guys...?" Eric tried to get Matt's attention as he ran past.

"Adam?" Again, no luck.

"Jeez, guys..." I took off after them. Following the sounds of their footsteps, I was soon outside. In the semi-darkness, I barely made out three shapes that seemed to be scuffling near one of the production trucks.

"Tell me where he is, Phil!"

"I swear, Matt, I don't know!"

"Liar." This was punctuated by the sound of flesh hitting flesh.

"Pleaassseeeee don't hurt me any more."

"Ease up!" I called out. "The little shit is telling the truth."

"He is? Damn." Adam stopped in mid-swing.

"That's what I've been trying to tell you." Phil whined

"Shut up." Adam sent a swift boot into Phil's ribs.

"Enough!" I shouted "This is getting us nowhere. You're sure Jeff said nothing to you about where he may be going?"

"How many different ways can I say this... I. Don't. Know. Where. He. Is." Phil scrambled to his feet. "And after this, I'll be damned if I'm gonna help you."

Phil ran to his car and drove away, leaving three very confused, and angry wrestlers.

"Rather than stand here looking stupid, I'm gonna do my own investigating." I growled "If you wanna help, I'd appreciate it, or if you'd rather just stand there with your dicks hanging out, that's okay too."

"What do you want us to do?" Matt queried

"Apologize to Phil for a start. There is one thing he knows. Where did he drop Jeff off exactly?"

"You heard him. He's not gonna help us." Adam interjected

"You're a smart guy, I'm sure you'll find some way to make him a little more cooperative without having to resort to another shit-canning. Dude, blame me if it'll help." I responded "Tell him Eric made us do it."

"Got it... let's go Adam."

I drove back to my house by himself, my only friend the radio. I flipped on an all-request oldies station by habit and soon lost myself in the tunes of my youth. I was only paying token attention when something the DJ said snapped me back real hard.

"We have a request here from Jeff going out to Eric... though I still haven't found what I'm looking for, we'll never be closer than we are right now. Maybe we can drink some red, red wine when I come back, 'coz when I'm with you, I always feel like I'm in my home, sweet, home."

I swerved off the road. Ignoring the yells from the other drivers, I was more anxious to find a piece of paper to write down the request. I knew Jeff's love of the abstract and what could be more abstract that giving me, Eric, a clue as to where he'd gone.

I wrote down as much of the dedication as he could remember. Adrenaline did terrible things for my memory.

I went over the note many times. Could Jeff be testing me? Would I cross the country to find him?

"Damn skippy." I drove back onto the road and was soon doing 180 going down I-90. My next stop: Cameron, North Carolina.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_For those of you who know the Where In the World Theme, here's a little teaser for you..._

_Well, he's snuck away from me_

_And he's headed back to Cameron_

_Now I'm trying hard to find him_

_Before he plans to bugger off!_

_I'm driving down 1-90_

_And I'd really like to know, so tell me..._

**_"WHERE IN THE WORLD IS JEFFREY NERO HARDY?"_  
**


	3. Look For Him In the United States

Look for him... in the United States

From the Rratedauthor...

Eric's a little busy right now, so he's asked me to take over the narrative for a while...

Eric was driving down I-90, heading for Erie, Pennsylvania, only slowing down occasionally to take a peek at the screen beside him. As soon as he'd found out where he needed to be, he quickly googled the most direct route. So far, he made up about three hours from the route he'd originally planned in his mind. He was intent on getting to Cameron before Jeff left. In fact, he was so focused that he didn't realize that his speed had been steadily increasing since he'd left the arena. He was now travelling almost a hundred and fifty miles per hour on the roads. This soon brought the 'Vette to the attention of the local Highway Patrol.

"Shit!" Eric soon noticed the cherries in the rear view mirror. He pulled over to the side, hoping that Jeff kept the registration in the glove compartment.

"Just remember to breathe." He told himself. "And don't say too much."

"Good day, Officer." Eric took a quick second to size up his opposition. The cop looked like he wasn't a day over twenty-two.

"Good day, Sir. Do you have any idea how fast you were going?" He asked

"I know I was going a little too fast. But, you see, I've got to get somewhere fast." Eric explained

The officer smiled. He'd heard this all before. "License, registration, and proof of insurance, please.'

Thankfully, Jeff did keep all his papers in the glove compartment. Eric handed them over.

"Just sit tight." The officer returned to his cycle, leaving Eric to stew. All the time he'd made up, he was losing due to his own stupidity.

Eric drummed his hand on the steering wheel, occasionally looking at the officer in the mirror. He seemed to be studying the papers intently.

"Fuck, Jeffro. What did you get me into this time?" Ideas of lapsed insurance, stolen vehicles, drugs in the spare tire jumped around in his head, adding to his already stressful day.

After what seemed like a lifetime, the officer returned.

"Just one question, sir?"

"Go ahead." Eric exhaled softly, bracing himself.

"Are you that wrestler guy?"

"Would it get me off the hook if I said yes?"

"No, but it would explain why you're driving a car registered to a Jeffrey N Hardy." The cop replied

"Well, I am. And I'm trying to find the aforementioned Jeffrey N Hardy." Eric answered "I have a good idea he went back to Cameron, and I wanted to get there before he decides to leave and send me another cryptic message. I don't want to drive halfway across the continent again."

"If I may make a comment, Sir, it strikes me that you didn't pay much attention to Jeff when he was around, but now he's gone, you're going in circles trying to find him."

Eric debated about whether or not to try to explain the whole idea that wrestling was staged, but he just wanted to get back on the road and with as little extra delay as possible.

Instead, he just smiled.

"I guess that proves that Eric really cares!" He said

"I guess." The officer handed him the ticket. "I'm only hitting you for one thirty, that'll save you a few bucks, just please slow down, okay?"

"Thanks. I appreciate it." Eric sighed "May I go?"

"Just remember, slow down."

Eric nodded, thankful the officer hadn't asked him for an autograph as well. He got back on the highway and continued on at a much slower speed. At least until he hit I-77 going into Charlotte, then he floored it again.

His pocket vibrated while he idled, waiting for a traffic light just outside of Fayetteville. He checked the number and flipped it open.

"Lemme call you back in five, Matt. I'm in traffic right now."

"Kay."

Eric drove into the nearest parking lot and called Matt back.

"Sorry, dude." He apologized

"Cool. Just calling to report. We got nothing for ya. Phil wouldn't talk. I even offered to suck him off, but he wouldn't bite."

"I'm not sure if that was meant to be a joke or not." Eric replied "But that's okay. I know where Jeff is. At least, I know where he was as of seven hours ago."

"Where?"

"He went home. I got a clue from him. He sent a request to a station he knows I listen to all the time." He didn't think it necessary to explain the clues, but suffice to say, the four song titles in the request added up perfectly.

"Ask him where he is now?" Eric heard Adam in the background.

"I can hear you Adam. I'm in the parking lot of a Wendy's just outside of Fayetteville, NC. I'm maybe ten minutes from the compound." Eric looked around. This was rural to say the least. From what he'd learned about Cameron, it's most recent population count was less than two hundred. Eric had never lived in a town with less that 200 000 people, so this was beyond small. This was microscopic.

"Awesome. Anything we can do?" Matt asked

"Not at the moment. I'll call you if I find out anything. I'll say hi to your Dad for you if I see him. You think he'll remember me?"

"If he doesn't, he'll just run at you with his shotgun." Matt replied

"That's okay, then." Eric replied "I won't hurt him too badly."

"Please don't... that would make Christmas very awkward." Matt giggled.

"Promise. I gotta go. Every second counts. If you could just pop by the house and make sure I locked everything, I'd appreciate it. I hate for someone to steal my stuff, or worse, Jeffro's bunny."

Matt guffawed loudly.

"What?" Eric queried

"The little twerp! He told me he got rid of it a long time ago!" Eric held the receiver away from his face so Matt wouldn't be laughing in his ear.

"Maybe it's a different one?" Eric asked when the noise was down to a tolerable level.

"Is a white and blue with a pink ribbon around it's neck?" Matt asked

"Yeah."

"That's the same one he's had since he was seven. Mom got it for him for Christmas." Matt chuckled

"That's probably why he still has it. Reminds him of his Mom. I'm sure you have something like that. Anyway, later, dude."

"Later."

Eric hung up and smiled. "I guess brothers don't tell each other everything after all."

It was approaching nightfall when he drove up to the address he'd found in the White Pages. Regrettably, the phone number was unlisted, or he might have been able to save a trip and just called, assuming that Jeff was there and would answer the phone. It had been a long time since he'd been here, having only visited the compound on one occasion, shortly after he and Jeff had made their relationship official, and apparently the whole town had turned out for the party. He parked the car next to what he assumed was the entrance way. Stowing his laptop in the trunk just in case, he smoothed his hair and tried to calm the nervousness. The place looked deserted. Maybe a good thing, maybe not. There might be no Jeff, but there also might be a gun-toting Gilbert either, if he believed what Matt had told him.

Eric passed what looked like a badminton net set up on the side of the property and took a rutted path through the fence.

"So far, so good." He thought "There's no sign of... what the fuck?"

He was suddenly blinded by light. "Who's there?"

Eric blocked some of the glare with his hand. "Gil?"

"Eric? What are you doing here?" The light was repointed at the ground.

"I'm looking for that multi-coloured son of yours." Eric breathed a little easier, noting that Matt had been joking about the gun.

"Jeff? He was here, but he left maybe three hours ago." Gil answered

"Crap." Eric groaned. He might've caught Jeff if he hadn't been so stupid earlier. "Any idea where he went or what's going on with him?"

"I sorta know what that boy o'mine is doing, but as to where he's going, he wouldn't even tell me." Gilbert answered

"If this is Jeff's idea of a relationship test, I'm really starting to get annoyed." Eric rubbed his jaw. "Well, sorry to bother you, sir. I guess I'm back to square one."

Eric turned, heading back to the car.

"Eric, come inside for a second. There is something I can tell you." Gilbert went into a large outbuilding nearby.

Eric debated a minute. The longer he delayed, the longer it would take to find Jeff. And right now, that's all he wanted to do was find Jeff and hold him. The longer he was away from him, the more it hurt. In the end, he followed Gilbert inside.

"Have a seat, son. Coffee?"

"Please." Eric sat at the table in the large kitchen. It still retained some of it's feminine touches, despite having been an all-male abode for many years.

"Cream and sugar?"

"Black, if you don't mind."

"Like me." Gil brought over two steaming mugs and sat down across from Eric.

Eric sipped the coffee. It was very black and really hot. Just the way he drank it.

"I am going to be brutally honest with you. It's the only way I know how to be, so don't take any of this personally, it's just the way I am... but what the hell are you doing?" Gilbert stared at Eric over his cup.

"In terms of what?" Eric expected something like this. He'd been taking flak from people ever since he'd left the company.

"Do you love my son?" Gilbert demanded

"Yes." Eric responded, blowing on his drink. "I do."

"Maybe you should start showing it." Gilbert barked

"If you'll forgive me sir, I have no idea where this is coming from." Eric set his cup down. "I thought I was..."

"I'm not blind, son. Jeffrey and I are close, despite his lifestyle choices. He's told me a lot of things."

"Like what, if I may ask."

"Well, for one thing, I know that you were released by Vince, so you basically have a lot of time on your hand, yet Jeff has to practically beg you to spend time with him." Gilbert looked sternly at Eric, who suddenly felt like he was eight years old and being called into the Principal's office.

"And he's also told me that you aren't real comfortable around him in public."

"That I will admit to." Eric stated "But it has nothing to do with Jeff, and I've explained that to him several times."

"How do you think that makes Jeff feel?" Gilbert retorted "For God's sake, are you blind or something?"

"Look, how I live my relationships are my own business!" Eric snapped "If Jeff had a problem, why the hell didn't he come talk to me instead of sending me traipsing halfway across the country to get a lecture from you?"

"I told you not to take this personally, Eric, didn't I. I'm just telling you the way I see things. Jeff doesn't know that we're having this conversation. In fact, all I was supposed to do was give you this when you arrived."

Gilbert handed Eric a sealed envelope.

Eric tore it open eagerly. What it contained was not what he'd hoped for.

"HBK X HHH X THE ROCK X RVD" Was all it read.

"Jeff, what are you doing to me?" Eric groaned "Well, it looks like I better get back on the road."

"It's your choice, but if I were you, I'd seriously consider staying the night." Gilbert gestured toward the window. During their conversation, a summer storm had whipped up. Looking outside, the trees were almost bent horizontally, the sky was filled with sheet lightning, and the rain came down steadily. Eric couldn't see where he'd parked Jeff's car.

"I hope the car is alright." He said "I'm glad I put the top up."

"These storms come out of nowhere sometimes." Gilbert stood from the table.

"I'll put you up in Matt and Jeff's old room."

"I guess I'm not goin' anywhere tonight." Eric followed Gilbert up the stairs.

"Bathroom's down the hall... if there's anything else you need, lemme know."

"Thanks, but I think I will just crash. I got get an early start tomorrow. God knows how much of a head start Jeffro has on me."

"C'ya in the mornin'." Gilbert trundled down the hall. Eric looked around the room. It was easy to tell which side of the room had been Matt's and which was Jeff's just by the decoration.

Eric lay down on the bed he knew was Jeff's. He reached inside his pocket for his phone.

"Did I wake you?" He asked the recipient of his late-night call.

"Nah. Jus' got back from the bar."

"Cool." Eric replied "Wish I was there, but apparently your little brother is sending me on a wild goose chase." Briefly, Eric summarized what had happened since his arrival in Cameron.

"So, right now, I'm crashing out on Jeffy's bed, waiting for this storm to ease up so I can go." Eric looked around the room. "He hasn't contacted you, has he?"

"Nothing. We're getting really worried. If he doesn't show soon, we may have to scrap our Wrestlemania plans." Matt answered

"I'm sure McMahon'd love that." Eric answered "How's your schedule?"

"Pretty open. After that brutal promo I did, Vince is cutting me a little slack on my pre-WM schedule." Matt replied

"How soon can you get here?" Eric asked

"If I left now, I could be there by morning." Matt responded

"Would you? I could use some one to talk to who isn't gonna give me a life lecture." Eric sighed

"I'm on my way." Matt said "Should I bring Adam?"

"If he wants to." Eric replied

"Okay. You'll see at least one of us soon..." The receiver crackled with a burst of static from nearby lightning. When it subsided, the phone was dead.

"I hope so." Despite his adrenaline pumping faster than ever before, Eric found it difficult to keep his eyes open. The storm soon had him sound asleep.

Right in the middle of a weird dream that saw Eric lying on the beach, staring at the stars, with the waves crashing against the seaside, he woke up. The sounds of the seaside morphed into one long droning noise, like a hive ready to swarm. Eric looked around, wondering what the funny noise was.

"Jeez, Matt." He groaned. The elder Hardy brother was snoring loudly. Even covering his head with a pillow didn't completely masque the sound.

"I guess I'm awake." If he hadn't already been semi-alert, he would've been seconds later when Gilbert shouted "Boys! Food's ready!" up the stairs.

"Why do I feel like I'm back at summer camp?" Eric mumbled.

"At least you didn't have to deal with this every day." Matt muttered, sounding like he'd give anything for five more minutes.

"When did you arrive?" Eric asked

"Right after the storm broke." Matt answered, still sounding deep in sleep.

"Between your snoring and Jeff's night crawling, it's a wonder any of you got any sleep." Eric slipped his shoes on.

"Now, boys!" Gil yelled up at them.

"Coming!" After being treated like a child last night, Eric did not want to face Gil's wrath again. "Move it!" He slapped Matt on the butt as he passed.

Eric was seated five seconds later. Matt joined within a couple of minutes."

"Mornin' boys. Ah thought ah was gonna hafta break out the heavy artillery."

Like condemned men, Matt and Eric dove into the food.

"What're yer plans for today, boys?" Gilbert asked

"As soon as we figure out where we're goin', we'll be on our way." Eric answered

"If you wanna stick around, I could use some strong hands around here." Gil responded

"Thanks, but I didn't come all the way out here to do chores." Eric answered

"I know... but you can't blame an old guy for trying." Gil laughed heartily.

"What did Jeff leave you?" Matt asked through a mouthful of food.

"It's upstairs." Eric responded "I'll show you after we eat. I'm sure there's a clue in it somewhere. But my mind was a mess last night."

"What do you think?" Eric asked. After the meal was eaten, and the dishes were cleaned, the two men took up back upstairs.

"Knowing Jeff, I think he sent us a clue as to where he took off to." Matt looked at the sheet of paper.

"How do you figure?" Eric sprawled out across the one bed, looking Matt up and down.

"Well, take a look at the first two sets of letters. HBK X HHH."

"So... What does Shawn Michaels and Triple H have to do with this?" Eric demanded

"Where's Shawn from?"

"San Antonio." Eric replied

"And Triple H?"

"Greenwich, right now."

"I'll be right back.' Matt ran out of the room and downstairs. Eric heard him rustling around for something. When he came back, he had an atlas in his hand.

"If we draw a line between San Antonio and Greenwich and what's the other pair.?"

"The Rock and RVD." Eric answered

"Okay, Miami Florida and Battle Creek Michigan." Matt drew another line across the Continental United States.

"Take a look at this." Matt showed Eric his handiwork. The two lines intersected just outside of Lexington, Kentucky.

"I think we just found our next stop." He said

**TO BE CONTINUED**

Jeff's on the road again, and it looks like Matt and Eric are in hot pursuit, hot pursuit. Next stop: Kentucky! Yee-haw!

See ya soon, pardners!


	4. The Loot The Warrant The Crook

The Loot... The Warrant... The Crook?

On the road to Lexington, Eric brooded. Thankfully, Matt was doing all the driving or Eric might've been tempted to send the car off the side of the road, possible into a nearby gully.

"Earth to Eric... come in, bro." Matt playfully slapped Eric

"Huh?" Eric started

"Dude, I've been talking to you for the past five minutes." Matt remarked

"Sorry, been thinking 'bout Jeff." Eric stared at the scenery. "Fuck, do I miss him."

"We all do." Matt added

"No, I mean really miss him." Eric's voice cracked. "I've been a crappy friend and an even worse boy friend."

"Eric, don't sell yourself short. I mean, you haven't..."

"Even your father tore me a new one last night. I am getting tired of explaining my actions to everyone!"

Eric pounded the dashboard. "I knew it was a mistake to get involved with Jeffro. He obviously wanted something more out of the relationship than I was willing to give him."

"I've known Jeff for 31 years and I still have a hard time figuring him out. So for you to say that Jeff wanted more than you were willing to give is nuts. Maybe he just needed to know that you care as deeply for him as he does for you. And believe me, he does." Matt replied

"Then why is he putting me through this? He could've just come out and said something." Eric bashed the dashboard a second time, unable to conceal his frustration any longer.

"Eric, you need to fuckin' relax." Matt barked "This isn't helping you, and it's really starting to annoy me."

"Well, fuck you too. I only invited you along because you seemed to be as worried as I am."

"Eric, I'm..."

"If you wanna bitch me out, then I'd suggest you stop the car, let me out, and go on your way. I can do this on my own." Eric stated

"Not a chance! We're in the middle of rural Kentucky..."

"Then get the fuck off my back, Matt!"

"Oh, that's it." Matt swerved over to the side of the road and slammed the brakes. Both he and Eric's heads whip-lashed forward, but he didn't care.

"Eric, for once in your stubborn life, listen to someone else for a change. My brother loves you. He loves you so much that I gave up my happiness for him. If anyone thinks they're making a mistake, it's me." Matt said each word as it's own sentence. William Shatner couldn't have done the line any better.

"Matt, I know that. You don't need to tell me." Eric massaged the back of his neck where it had contacted the head rest.

"Eric, I just did."

"I guess so." Smoothing out his hair, Eric looked at the other man. "So now what?"

Matt had an answer, but there was no way he was going to explain what was going through his head at that particular moment. It would only screw up an already screwed up situation.

"We are going to drive to Lexington, and hopefully we can find Jeff. Once we do, I expect you to get down on your knees and apologize to him for being a stuck-up ass." Matt replied

"And if I don't?" Eric demanded

"Then I'm gonna bend you over the back of the car and make you." Matt looked over, completely deadpan. "And believe me, that would hurt you a lot more than it would hurt me."

"Then drive on, Hardy. Despite the size of your piece, I ain't goin' that way. I only get involved with one brother at a time, if that." Eric stared at his reflection in the side view mirror. The person who looked back was not the Eric he knew. Hopefully, finding Jeff would bring that back to him. Jeff had said that something was missing in his life, now Eric also seemed to be missing a part of himself.

In Lexington, they met up with Adam. Originally, Adam was planning to meet up with them in Cameron, but the freak storm that had dumped seven inches of rain the night before had washed out a section of the highway. Unable to navigate that stretch of road, he'd taken a detour and was passing Louisville around the same time Matt and Eric were just leaving North Carolina. One phone call later and Adam was pulling into the parking lot of a local mall, waiting patiently for the two of them to show.

"Hey, Cope." Eric stretched his legs, getting out of the car. Both his ankles and knees popped loudly.

"Hey. Sounds like you're getting a case of the Jimmy legs." Adam sniggered over his double soy latte.

"Whatever." Eric moaned "We drove straight from Cameron. My legs have been cramped in that car for way too long."

"I tole ya you coulda rode in the back seat." Matt said, joints also popping when he exited the car.

"If I'd rode in the back, we'd be somewhere in New Jersey right now." Eric massaged his calves, ignoring the pin pricks as the blood flowed back into his legs. "I know how you are with map reading."

"Anyway, guys, what now?" Adam asked "Any idea where Jeff may be? Lexington is a fairly big city."

"I'm hoping there's another clue in the note he left Eric." Matt pulled the dog-eared scrap from his pocket.

Eric and Adam crowded around Matt while they read and re-read the brief note.

"Nothing I can see." Adam frowned

"Yeah, me neither." Matt agreed

Eric stared at the paper, moving his lips in some silent conversation.

"You got something, Stryker?" Adam queried

There was no reply from Eric, just continued staring at the paper. "There has got to be another clue here that I'm missing. We got here, but now what?"

"Eric, did you ever look at the back of the paper?" Adam had seen something that neither of the other two had noticed; they had been so intent on the cryptic writing on the one side.

Eric flipped the page over. There was an address scrawled across the back.

"God, I can't see things that are right in front of me. Maybe I should get a job as a referee." Eric groaned

"Separate cars?" Adam asked

"You two go ahead. I'm gonna walk." Eric replied

"WALK! Are you nuts man? It's gonna take forever." Adam knew exactly where they were going.

"Yeah, bro." Matt agreed "Jeff will definitely be gone by the time you arrive."

"So? I'm beginning to wonder if all this is worth it? Face it, in the last two days, I've raced halfway across the country, been bitched at by almost every member of the Hardy family, almost gotten busted for doing one-fifty in an eighty-five zone, and to top all that off, I am nowhere closer to finding Jeff than I was when I started this insane pursuit." Eric gasped once he finished getting all that out.

Matt and Adam looked at each other, the same thought crossing their minds.

"Eric, what are you saying?" Matt asked

He looked up, idly staring at the address on the sheet of paper. "If you two want to find him, go for it. I'm sure Vince will be quite happy to have both halves of the match present for Wrestlemania, but I don't care anymore. Jeff wanted me to prove how much I love him. Well, I guess I don't."

Eric scrunched up the paper and started walking away. Adam chased after him, catching up near the entrance to the mall.

"What's gotten into you?" he demanded

"Nothing's gotten into me. Maybe it's what's gotten into everyone else." Eric replied

"C'mon, Eric, don't be like this." Adam pleaded

"Adam, don't you start with me too." Eric grabbed him by the front of his shirt and pulled him face-to-face. "Because I am about ready to snap. Believe me, you don't want to see that." He pushed Adam backwards and continued his trek into the mall.

Looking back at Matt, who gave him a 'follow him, dumb ass' look, Adam followed Eric into the mall proper.

"Don't make me get physical." Eric replied "'Cause I will."

"You sound pissed off." Adam answered

"I am pissed off."

"Good! At least that proves that there's still a human being in there somewhere." Adam grabbed Eric by the collar and spun him around. "You talk about this thing like you're the only person affected by it all, when you're not."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Eric ignored the stares from other shoppers.

"Do you really think this is just about you??? How do you think Matt feels right now? Fuck, Eric, it's about time you got a clue. While Jeff may be testing your relationship, this goes way beyond you and he." Now it was Adam's turn to go nose-to-nose.

"Then get everyone this goes way beyond to find him, because I give up! I am going to find a phone, call me a cab, and get my ass to the nearest airport. I am going home and maybe try to forget this whole mess. If you do find Jeff, tell him to get his shit, bunny included, out of my house!" Eric stormed across the concourse toward a bank of pay phones.

"Well, that worked real well." Adam muttered, watching Eric go. He was unsure whether Eric was serious or he was just throwing a fit, and he didn't want to start another scene if Eric was indeed serious.

"Oh, well. God knows I tried." Adam walked back the way he'd come. Wonder of wonders, Matt was waiting for him just outside.

"Well, where is he?" Matt asked

"Obviously not here." Adam smarted off. "We have bigger problems. I think Eric is serious." He briefly repeated their inside conversation.

"Oh, yeah. Over Jeff's dead body, he is." Matt saw the gravity of the situation. If for whatever reason, Jeff was keeping tabs on his 'pursuers', he might disappear permanently when he realized that Eric had given up the trail.

"Matt, maybe we should..." Adam realized that he was talking to Matt's back as the Hardy boy strode violently back into the mall.

"How soon will you..."

Matt depressed the handle on the phone, severing the conversation. Eric looked over, an I can't believe you just did that expression on his face.

"Fine, I'll use my cell." Eric fumbled his phone out of his pocket. Like a cat, Matt grabbed it and stuck it down the front of his jeans.

"Gimme that, you son of a bitch!" Eric roared

"If you thought I was on your back earlier, you ain't seen nothing! I'll be damned if I'm running across the country only to have you go chickenshit just because you're feeling a little unhappy." Now it was Matt's turn to go face-to-face with Eric. "We're all in this together, and I mean ALL of us."

"Screw this. I am going home!" Eric stared into Matt's eyes. Adam watched, wondering who was going to blink first.

"No, you're not! You're gonna get in Jeff's car, or Adam's, I don't care which and we are going to this address." Matt retorted

"Don't I get a say in this?" Eric demanded

"Not after this bullshit stunt you're pulling." Matt answered "Now you can either come along nicely or I will give you a Twist of Fate right here and drag your unconscious behind halfway around the world if necessary!"

"Uh, Matt..."

"What Adam?" Matt asked, not taking his gaze from Eric's. So far, neither man had blinked.

""I think we're gonna have company." Three mall cops were walking toward them.

"Deal with them." Matt ordered "I'll take care of Eric."

While Adam kept the cops occupied with some story about a family crisis, Matt forcefully pushed Eric out the nearest door.

"Let go of me. I can fuckin' walk!" Eric protested

"Just move." Matt dragged Eric along like he would a stubborn child. He refused to relinquish his hold until they were back at their cars.

"Asshole." Eric growled

"Eric, get in the car." Matt said

"Fuck you." He retorted, turning away.

"Fine. We'll do this my way, then." Matt threw open the door, grabbed Eric by the hair and tossed him inside, slamming the door behind him. Eric sulked in the rear passenger seat while Matt waited for Adam's return.

Matt waited impatiently for Adam to return. Finally, he glimpsed his long mane approaching.

"We cool?" He asked

"Chillin'. I told the rent-a-cops Eric just got some bad news and wasn't taking it well."

"Did it work?"

"Do you see any of them around?" Adam pointed

"Nice, man. You mind leavin' your car here for a bit? I need someone to ride shotgun with Eric. I dunno what's gotten into him, but I can't drive and watch him at the same time..."

"Beats me. Eric was never much for talkin' when something was buggin' him." Adam interrupted "But I'm your man."

Adam swung into the seat next to a still sullen Eric. "Still feelin' down?"

"Leave me alone." Eric answered, slouching further down in the seat. Much more and he'd be on the floor.

"Aw, Eric, come on." Adam put on his little boy voice. "Why don't you tell uncle Adam what's really bothering you?"

Eric looked over disgusted. "Does that ever work?"

"Only with Jay." Adam answered

"Do I look like Jay to you?" Eric scrunched himself together.

"Fine, you don't have to tell me. I know what's bothering you. You miss Jeff so bad it's tearing you apart inside and you're putting on this front because you can't handle it." Adam put his hand on Eric's shoulder. To his surprise, Eric didn't shrug it away.

"And how would you know?" Eric demanded "Your track record with relationships ain't exactly stellar."

"Because I did the same damn thing." Adam answered "I know we're not exactly best of friends, but you do have someone who has expertise in this particular area. I know what you're going through. If I didn't, I wouldn't be here, right?"

"On the way down here, you were bemoaning the fact that you were missing him." Matt interjected

"That's your problem, Eric. You bottle things up until it gets to be too much for you. You're like a magnum of champagne. You're fine as long as your cork holds, but once that starts to give way, things get real messy."

"Are we talking about my emotional state or my sex life?" Eric actually smiled.

"Dunno. I usually don't get involved with my coworkers." Adam answered

Matt snorted loudly.

"Okay, okay. Point taken." Adam flicked his hair back out of his face. "So, Eric, basically what I think I'm trying to say is you're not alone in this. You've got me, you've got Matt, and I'm pretty sure I could get most of the guys to drop everything if we needed them."

'Vince'll love that. Wrestlemania weekend, and ninety-five percent of the roster is scattered across the country looking for Jeff." Matt laughed

"Not much he could do about it." Adam answered "But seriously, you may not think this right now, but you are lucky to have Jeff, even if he does make you do strange things. I know there are a few guys on the roster who'd kill to be in your shoes."

"Like who?" Eric asked, not taking his eyes from the scenery.

"Oh... I've heard John Morrison's name mentioned." Adam said "The Miz, too."

"Both the Shaman of Sexy and the Chick Magnet? I guess we'll have to start calling him the Dick Magnet." Eric responded "Who else?"

"Um..."

"We're here, guys." Matt interrupted

Adam breathed a sigh of relief. Had the conversation gone any further, it could've been really embarrassing to the R-rated superstar. He knew of only one other person who was sorta interested in Jeff that way, but how to explain it? He'd never been with a guy, but there was something about Jeff that piqued his bi-curiosity. He'd almost been ready to make a move when Jeff had started 'dating' Eric. Thankfully, this had squashed most of the interest but sometimes, when he couldn't sleep, Adam would start thinking about Jeff and what their relationship could have been. The rare time he needed to get off, this was the fantasy he used, but by no means did Adam consider himself anything but straight. At least not now that Jeff was "off the market", as JBL would say.

"Eric, if you promise to be good for the rest of the journey, I'll buy you some Skittles when we get home." Matt parked the car just off Martin Luther King Drive.

"Matty, I hate Skittles... you know that!" Eric whined

"You do?" Adam exclaimed "How does Jeff put up with you?"

"Dunno." Eric replied

They walked from the car, down a dark alley, toward the address Jeff had left them.

"Where exactly are we going?" Eric asked

"Just stay close." Matt warned "This isn't the best of neighborhoods."

The trio headed, single file, to the back entrance of one of many similar-looking tenements that made up this area.

"I don't like this place one bit." Adam said

"Me neither." Eric shivered, bringing up the rear. The only sounds were their footsteps crunching across the semi-frozen ground.

"Number 3." Matt said "Here we are."

Before Matt could even knock, the door was swung open and a masked man stood in front of them.

"Get inside! Now!" He ordered. If his voice hadn't carried enough force, then the snub-nosed pistol he had pointed at them sure did.

Hoping this wasn't their Green Mile, Matt, Adam, and Eric followed the man inside. They had only traveled a few steps when the silence was suddenly shattered by the sounds of gunfire, followed by a series of thuds. Sounding like wet sandbags hitting the ground, they were soon overtaken by a much more eerie sound... the sound of silence.

**To Be Continued**

_From North Carolina to Kentucky... is this where the trail ends?_

_And for those of you who want it, there will be a return to the delightful world of hot man-on-man sex in the next chapter... I just haven't figured out who, where, and how to make it fit into the adventure yet... stay tuned!  
_


	5. The Chase, part 2

The Chase, part 2!!!

"What the hell has Jeff gotten us into this time?" Matt gut-whispered, following their new friend down a poorly lit hallway.

"Fucked if I know." Adam replied. Only Eric remained silent. This reminded him of a movie he'd seen a long time ago, the name of which escaped him at that exact moment, but he was more concerned with getting out in one piece. As he recalled, no one did in the movie.

"I don't like this one bit..."

"Quiet!" The man with the gun hissed. He led the three to the end of the passageway and opened a door. In the dim light, they could see a set of stairs going into what they presumed was a basement. "These walls have ears."

Now in complete silence, they descended a set of steps that seemed to have been dug right out of the earth. There was no hand rail, and the footing would have been difficult in the best light, so it's no wonder that Eric tripped going down.

"Fuck..." He careened into Matt, who bounced into Adam and all three of them ended up at the bottom of the stairs. The only person not down there was this stranger, who simply stared at them with an amused expression.

"Don't move, whatever you do." He leveled the gun at them. Before you could say "Reeking of Suckitude", he fired three shots.

"I'm gonna die in a basement in Kentucky. Not how I planned to go!" Eric thought

"I want my mommy!" Adam wailed, grabbing onto Matt for comfort.

"Me too!" Matt shouted

After the shots were fired, there was a deafening silence. Very slowly, the three wrestlers opened their eyes and were quite shocked to discover that they weren't dead.

"What..." Matt was the first to realize that he wasn't dead, and he was also holding onto Adam in a most un-manly way. While they let go of each other, and tried to pretend that everything was normal, in a butch kind of way, Eric just looked at everyone with an expression of pure anger.

"What the hell is going on here?" He yelled, not giving a rat's patootie about the walls having ears, eyes, or any other part of the human anatomy.

"I thought professional wrestlers were more coordinated than that. Here y'are, can't even walk down a simple set of stairs." The guy with the gun sat down on a sat above them and watched with amusement as Matt and Adam stood and brushed loose dirt from themselves. Eric sat on the floor; if his eyes could shoot laser beams at that particular moment, there would be a pile of ash nearby.

"I repeat... what the hell is going on? And why did you try to kill us. For Christ's sake, you don't even know us."

"Ah'll explain ever'thing to you shortly. As for trying to kill you, yee-haw, that's a good 'un." Kentucky Joe (as Eric was now mentally referring to this stranger) slapped his thigh. "Down here, we gots ourselves some real big rats. If I hadn't shot when I did, one of you boys might be missing a finger, or a toe, or another part of yer anatomy you might need."

Joe waved his gun in the corner behind the trio. The smoking carcasses of three large rats, almost twice the size as New York sewer rats, lay in a pile.

"I guess we owe you a thanks." Eric finally stood, looking disdainfully at the surroundings.

"Don't warrant nothin'." Joe answered "But Ah think we'd better get down to business."

"Works for me." Adam replied, still a little shaken from the earlier excitement.

"Now which one of you'se is Eric?"

"That would be me." Eric still didn't trust this character, but since Joe still held a gun, he had very few options.

"Then ah was told to give you this." Joe reached into the back pocket of his coveralls and pulled out an envelope, similar to the one he'd received from Gil back in Cameron. Eric groaned.

"Why couldn't you have just given this to him upstairs?" Matt asked, also a little stirred up by the recent activities.

"Coz ah was told to expect one person, not three." Joe answered "Ah had to make sure that one of you'se was the right person."

"If not...?"

"BANG!" Joe mimed pulling the trigger.

"Yer friend also said that you weren't to read this until you left here. So I suggest you git 'fore someone starts pokin' their noses around here. Gunshots do tend to stir up trouble."

They needed no further suggestions. Adam, Matt, and Eric ran back up the stairs and out of the building lickety-split. Joe just watched them go.

"Them's were strange critters." At the mention of critters, his eyes licked over the three dead rats.

"Oh well, waste not, want less as ah always say." Grabbing them by their tails, he carried the trio of rodents upstairs into the kitchen. At about the same time, the other three were just getting back to Adam's car, still in the parking lot, Joe was settling down to a nice meal of... you guessed it, Rat-atouille.

"What does Jeff do? Find the strangest people in town he can?" Eric wiped the sweat from his forehead. "Much more of this, and I'll be running for Edge's mommy."

"I was going to ask you about that, Matt..." Adam furrowed his brow.

"Uh, yeah..." Matt tried not to look completely ashamed. "Your mom is kinda hot, Adam."

"Oh, that is so wrong is so many ways, I'm not going to even go there." Adam mimed throwing up.

"New subject..." Eric interrupted, waving the envelope between the two men's faces. "...anybody wanna bet that Jeff is not going to come out and tell me where he is with this one?"

Eric was right. Over the next three days, they went from Lexington, to Nashville, and then on to Houston. Each time they went to a new city, the clues got more and more obscure. By Houston, all Jeff had left them was a photograph. It was a picture of him eating a bag of Skittles outside a McDonald's with the words "Think of Matty" written underneath.

"You know, guys." Eric yawned, waking up for the fourth day in a row in the back seat of Jeff's Vette. To make things easier, they had left Adam's rental in Lexington. "The more we do this, the more I'm convinced that Jeff has had this thing planned for a long time."

"Whaddaya mean?" Matt asked

"This picture. Jeff has always been only a few hours ahead of us. There is no way he could've gotten all the way here, then back to Houston to leave this for us. That dude is worse than the people who plan the Amazing Race." Eric stretched; hearing the tendons crackle was a morning occurrence now, it hurt like hell but at least he was getting used to it.

"Well, at least we made good time last night." Adam yawned noisily as they passed a sign saying "Welcome to Philadelphia". Over several beers at a local bar, they had come up with what they'd hoped was the right answer to Jeff's most recent cypher. "Think of Matty" obviously made reference to the fact that Matt and Jeff were brothers which immediately led them to go to the City of Brotherly Love: Philadelphia. Or so they hoped. But the next problem was which McDonald's? Going from one to another would take way too long.

"Is there any possible way we can spend tonight in a real bed?" Eric asked "I mean, we've been playing catch up with Jeff since Cameron. He's probably already wherever this chase is gonna end, just waiting for me to show up with a bouquet of flowers or something. What harm can a decent night's sleep for all of us do?"

"I agree with Eric." Adam added "These marathon driving sessions are doing nothing for our internal clocks. We can't go on driving eight hour stretches forever, man."

What Adam said made sense. It had seemed like a good idea when they first started for each of them to drive eight hours on, then rest for sixteen. After four days, however, nerves were frazzled, tempers were short and sleep was becoming harder and harder for any of them to get with any regularity.

"Okay, we'll stop tonight." Matt said

"Yay!" Eric cheered, thinking of a nice warm bed, a soft pillow, and maybe some nice room service.

They spent the rest of the day tooling around Philly, looking for the right McDonald's, but there were just so damn many of them, it was impossible to tell which one was the one in the photograph.

"Okay, I'm officially cross-eyed." Eric said "Can we find a motel and crash?"

"Yeah, I'm falling asleep at the wheel." Adam groaned

Good news and bad news greeted their arrival at the nearest Motel 6. They did have a room, but it only had a single and a double bed.

"We'll take it." Eric was too tired to get into an argument with either Matt or Adam, so he plopped his Visa on the counter before either of them could protest. Somehow, they dragged their sorry behinds up into the room.

"I call dibs." Matt said, planting on the single bed. Within seconds, he was asleep, snoring lightly.

"Damn." Both Eric and Adam said simultaneously.

"I'll take the side nearest the wall." Adam offered

"Cool. You want the bathroom first?"

"Thanks. You know, it's a good thing we brought extra clothes." Adam joked

"Yeah. You smell bad enough as it is." Eric retorted

"I'll get you for that..." Adam mock-swung at Eric as he passed.

"Okay, dude, just hurry up." Eric sat down on the bed and waited for Adam to finish his bathroom activities. He was in and out in five minutes. Eric took even less time, but by the time he'd brushed his teeth and washed up, Adam was already curled up under the covers, fast asleep.

Looking at Matt, sprawled across the other bed, still in his streetwear, Eric wondered if he should at least the guy's shoes off.

"If he wants them off, he can do it himself." Eric crawled into the bed beside Edge, hoping that the space between them was enough. He'd read about Edge's spooning incident with Rhyno in his book, and hoped that the Canadian did not have any inclination to be the aggressor this time.

Eric was also fast asleep in seconds. Not ten minutes after they were all out, the rain started again. It was almost as bad as the storm that had wracked Cameron a few days earlier, but they all slept through most of it.

The rain had tapered to a low hiss when Eric suddenly awoke to a low moaning from the bed beside him.

"God, Matt snores, you groan, Jeff crawls... when the hell am I gonna get a decent fucking night's sleep?" Eric thought, turning over to try to reclaim his slumber. He was almost out, when Adam moaned again.

Eric opened his red eyes, confused. If he'd heard correctly, Adam had just moaned the name of the guy they were looking for. He waited, thinking maybe he'd been hearing things when he heard it again.

"Jeff."

"What the...?" Eric rolled over, about to say something. He completely forgot what he was going to say. Adam had kicked the covers aside and was lying there, only in his boxers. This was nothing out of the ordinary, but the raging hard-on that was poking out of the shorts was. It pointed at the ceiling, almost begging for contact with something.

As Eric watched, Adam shifted position slightly. His hand brushed across the tip of his dick, eliciting another groan from him, followed by an "Oh, Jeff..."

Was this really happening... was Adam having erotic dreams about HIS boyfriend? Eric couldn't believe what he was seeing, but the more he watched, and the more he listened, the more it made sense.

Adam suddenly tossed to his left. Now he was pressed against Eric, his aroused member not three inches from where Eric lay, trying to figure out the best plan. Should he wake Adam up and confront him or just play it off as some innocent fantasy. His mind was made up the instant Adam mumbled something that sounded like "C'mon, Jeff... Please... You know I want you to..." followed by being stabbed in the side by Adam's seven incher.

"Adam, wake up!" Eric softly shouted. He didn't want to wake Matt up as well.

Adam just continued thrusting. At what, Eric could only guess, but the repeated pokings were starting to hurt.

"Adam..." Eric hissed louder

"Please Jeff, let me come!" Adam whimpered.

Eric looked over. Matt was still sleeping peacefully. How he could with Adam making all that noise was, and still is, a mystery. Or maybe he was just faking it and playing with himself under the covers, who knows?

"Fuck. Okay, Adam, one time only." He cupped his fist into a circle and took a hold of Adam, stroking him slowly. Adam started pumping Eric's fist immediately, his hips thrusting harder with each stroke.

"Why the hell am I doing this?" Eric thought, but then realized for the sake of both of them, the less he thought about it, the better.

Eric rolled to his left, sending the overly-aroused Canadian onto his back. In the light from the window, Eric saw Adam's penis for the first time. He was packing some serious lumber, to use a hockey term. With each stroke, it got harder and longer. Despite this, Adam slept on. Was this possible?

Eric quickened the pace. He heard Adam gasp loudly, and then felt his dick go into convulsions in his hand. His fist became slick, like a rubber glove and he finished Adam with a few quick jerks before wiping his hand on the underside of the blanket.

"Don't ever say that I don't do anything for you." Eric closed his eyes and was soon fast asleep.

By the time Adam had awakened that morning, both Eric and Matt were up, dressed, and staring at the photo of Jeff.

"Oh, man, what a night. I am so stiff."

Eric coughed noisily.

Matt looked up from the table. "Okay?"

"Yeah. Just got something caught in my throat." Eric lied.

"Anything to report? Or are we spending another day checking out fast-food joints?" Adam rolled out of bed and the first thing Eric noticed what a large dark spot on his boxer shorts. Memories of what he'd allowed to happen the night before brought a combination of anger and jealousy to his mind. Thankfully, he kept them in check. What good would it do to alienate someone he needed help from? Later, maybe, but not now.

"We think we got something." Matt said

"Oh." Adam put his pants on, then came over. "What'd we miss?"

"Take a look at this... doesn't that look like the Wachovia Center?" Matt pointed to a large building, all but cut off save a small portion that was visible over Jeff's right shoulder.

"Well, let's go."

In minutes, they were back on the road.

"This place brings back memories." Adam leaned back, letting his lion's mane blow in the wind.

"Yeah. ECW."

"Don't remind me." Eric groused "How about something more pleasant... like the Survivor Series?"

Matt laughed. Adam didn't.

"Team DX wiping the floor with team Rated RKO." Matt gently tapped Adam on the leg.

"Best time of my life." Eric joined in.

"Huh?" Adam queried

"I was in the fifth row." Eric explained "Unfortunately, I was in the Matt and Jeff cheering section."

"Unfortunately? Whaddaya mean 'unfortunately'?" Matt demanded

"The entrance ramp killed half our crow. We sound pitiful on the DVD." Eric replied

"We still killed, though." Matt stated

"You guys both suck. You got lucky, that's all." Adam rebutted

"Lucky?... After HBK KO'ed Mike Knox twelve seconds into the match, RKO was SOL." Eric laughed "Then..."

While Matt and Eric rehashed the match, elimination by elimination, taking much pleasure in the 'Canadian Pinata' comment that Jim Ross had made, Adam lay back in his seat, still feeling extremely awkward. He remembered, with vivid detail, the dream he'd had the night before. It was not the first time he'd dreamed about Jeff in that manner, but to do it while sleeping next to the guy Jeff was dating? As well, Adam was positive he'd blown a load as well, and this made just being near Eric very uncomfortable for him.

While talking with Matt, inwardly, Eric was stewing. Not because of what had happened earlier. He'd actually enjoyed getting Adam off as much as Adam had. It was the reason behind it that royally pissed him off.

"I guess I better watch my step." He thought, a sudden realization hitting him. He had been taking all this for granted. Unless he wanted to lose Jeff, and to Adam of all people, he had better start acting like he gave a fuck.

"I may not be the right man for Jeff, but I'll be Goddamned if I'm gonna lose him to you."

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_Next stop, Philadelphia, and a revelation that will floor everyone!_


	6. A Life or Death Situation

A Life Or Death Decision

Driving to the restaurant, the car was filled with a lot of idle chatter; none of it having anything to do with their quest. The radio hadn't uttered a peep since Eric and Matt had left Cameron, and this was simply due to not being able to agree on the music. There was no happy medium between what Matt listened to and Eric's tastes. Add Edge to the mix and things got even more complex. If you could meld Genesis, Soundgarden, and Good Charlotte into one, you'd come close to appeasing all of them, but until then, don't even try.

"So, Adam, when did you realize that the second turnbuckle wasn't in the match?"

"Enough, already." Adam was getting sick of the incessant needling he'd been receiving since they left the motel. "I could make a few comments, myself."

"Go ahead. For once in your life, come up with something relevant, and possibly funny." Eric dared him.

"It doesn't fit into funny, but it must've been a real cold night when you two had your tables-ladders-chairs-tuxedo match." Adam said "Even with the match on my 48 inch plasma screen, there wasn't much to look at."

Eric and Matt, looked at each other, shrugging.

"Whatever, man." Matt refocused on driving. Eric just sat back, until an evil thought came to his mind.

"Just why were you staring at those particular parts of our anatomy in the first place, Copeland?" he asked "Correct me if I'm wrong, but we don't play for the same team, do we?"

"Fuck, no!" Adam shouted, but then had a difficult time coming up with a believable explanation for why he had, indeed, been ogling both Matt and Eric's lower regions during the match.

"I think Addy's hiding something." Eric teased

"Me too." Both Eric and Matt giggled like a couple of schoolgirls. This only enraged Adam more.

"Fuck you, both of you!" He yelled

"Was that a statement or a suggestion?" Eric flicked Adam's ear.

"C'mon, guys, leave me alone." Adam pleaded

His tone eerily reminded Eric of their encounter the night before. He decided not to push it any further, but that didn't stop Matt.

"I think Adam's still afraid to come out of the closet." Matt stated, swerving into the fast food joint's almost-empty parking lot.

"I am not!" Adam shot back, but then quickly added "I'm not into guys!" when he realized how that sounded.

"Someone's in denial." Matt shut the car off. With their usual grace, the trio jumped from the vehicle and quickly scoured the area.

"Found it." Matt grabbed yet another yellow envelope that had been stuck to the side of the Golden Arches. If it hadn't rained the previous night, they might have missed it completely.

"Well, what does it say?" Eric demanded impatiently.

"You gonna lemme open it first?" Matt took what seemed to be forever to slit it open. Again, a single sheet of paper. Matt quickly read it, then passed it to Adam, who also read it, then passed it over to an anxious Eric.

"What the... an arrow?" Eric crumpled the page in his hand. "This is getting ridiculous!" He yelled at the sky. "Jeffrey Nero Hardy, I am not amused!"

"So, I guess we trek on." Matt said

"Yeah, which way was it pointing?" Eric asked. If he was going to do a lot more walking, he sure as hell didn't want to start off in the wrong direction.

"That way... I can already see another envelope." Matt ran off.

"Considering this is supposed to be my quest, he's sure anxious." Eric took off at a more leisurely pace, Adam trailing close behind.

Maybe 100 yards away, they found another envelope, with another arrow, which led them to yet another envelope and another arrow and so on. Twenty minutes, and fifteen envelopes later, they were inside the arena, looking for their next clue.

"Got it." Matt pointed. Hanging from a catwalk high overhead was something yellow and fluttering. Eric's heart sank.

"Damn! Jeff knows I hate heights." He gulped "Am I supposed to face my fears as well?"

"I'll get it.." Matt offered

"No, this is mine." Eric replied "I'm not taking any chances with either of you. If someone's gonna pull an Owen on this, it will be me. Now how do I get up there?"

"That way, maybe." Adam pointed to a ramp.

"Cool. Wait here." Eric jogged off, feeling that this quest was becoming less and less about finding Jeff and more and more about finding out out who he was. Annoying, to say the least. Eric already had a real good idea of who he was, and a catwalk-climbing, racing-across-the-country, almost-getting-shot-by-a-strange-guy-with-a-gun guy wasn't it.

Matt and Adam watched from the floor as Eric became smaller and smaller, climbing higher and higher until he'd reached the ramp that led directly to the catwalk. Flashing a thumbs-up, even though he'd never felt less sure about anything in his life, Eric took the short flight of stairs and walked across the catwalk. He could see the envelope flapping only a short distance away, but some idiot had attached it directly under one of the air vents. This made it almost impossible to get a grip on it without dangling in mid-air.

"Dammit, Jeff, you're not making this easy." Eric growled, flattening himself out and reaching as far as he could. He was still about a foot short.

"What's he doing?" Matt demanded, watching Eric inch his way over the side until he had wrapped his legs around the supports as his only means of hanging on.

"We should've gone up there with him." Adam lamented

"He said he wanted to do this on his own." Matt reminded him.

"I know, but..." Adam couldn't finish his thought. Eerie reminders of what had happened a decade ago in St. Louis still haunted him.

"Don't look down... whatever the fuck you do, Stryker, don't look down!" Eric talked to himself as a way of focusing. Regrettably, he didn't listen to his own advice. He looked down, only for a moment, but enough to make his knees shake. Not a good thing, when they're the only thing holding you up. He felt first one, then the other, start to lose its grip and before you could say "team extreme", Eric was dangling high above the arena floor, holding to the catwalk's supports for dear life with one hand while desperately trying to find something else to grip.

"Okay, that worked really well. Next time, listen to your own advice." Eric chided himself. Surprisingly, he was not in a full-blown panic mode yet, despite having his life depend on how long he could maintain his grip.

"Damn! I knew I should've become a Power Ranger instead of a professional wrestler." Humour was the only thing that was keeping him from going all panicky.

Eric started swinging, hoping to find a grip for his other hand. Several swings later, and before his wrist completely snapped, he got a handhold on another support. While this alleviated his short-term problem, his inability to make like a Power Ranger and teleport to safety compounded his predicament.

"I wonder how long I can hold on?" As soon as he'd said this, Eric felt his one hand, the one that had kept him up all this time, start to slip.

"Fuck!" He valiantly held on, but it was useless. Once his hand gave way, his other only held for a couple seconds before it too gave way and he fell. Shutting his eyes, Eric awaited impact... but it never came. He fell maybe six feet before his vertical descent was stopped by two pairs of hands grabbing him. As soon as Matt and Adam had seen Eric lose his grip, they sprinted to where he was and had reached his position a mere moment before.

"Stop squirmin', buddy. We got ya!"

Slowly, they maneuvered Eric back onto the catwalk. They all just sat, heaving, as the recent events sunk themselves into their collective psyches. All three of them were white-faced, Eric more so, and Matt was even shaking from the adrenaline rush.

"Now can I give up this insane quest?" Eric gasped, lying on the metal walkway, eyes screwed shut. "Dammit, that brother of yours almost killed me. If my death was what he wanted to prove that I give a shit about him, I think we can safely assume that I do."

"Sit tight, E. I'm gonna take care of this." Much more agilely than Eric, Adam swung out on the same supports that had been Eric's undoing.

"Careful. I don't think I can drag you back here all by myself." Matt watched his progress anxiously. Eric still was unable to open his eyes.

Like nothing, Adam grabbed the still-flapping envelope and was back to safety almost before Matt could finish his sentence.

"Like I told ya... piece o' cake." Adam slit the envelope and smiled.

"I got good news and bad news... the good news is it's not another arrow... the bad news is, it's probably the next step in our quest."

"In that case, let's get the hell out of here and see what we got." Matt suggested

Using a lot more caution, they eased down to solid ground, Eric having to be helped by the others. He was still affected by his near-death experience and no amount of pressuring could make him go any faster than simple baby steps.

Once they were on the arena floor, only then did Adam read the contents of the envelope.

_I think that I've been here before_

_But I can't remember when_

_And I've got this funny feeling_

_That we'll all be together again._

_There's no straight lines that make up my life_

_And all the roads have bends_

"That doesn't sound like typical Hardy poetry." Adam said

"I agree. I know Jeff's style that sure as hell ain't it." Matt concurred

"Anybody got an idea?" Adam demanded "Eric?"

"Oh yeah, Eric has an idea." When really annoyed, Eric would often talk in the third person, and this was one of those occasions.

"What you got?"

"Well, the poem is from an old song... Harry Chapin's 'Circle'..."

"Jeff has been running us in circles." Matt interrupted "But I don't get it."

"Well, think about it... what's so unique about a circle?" Eric leaned back, crossed his arms, and stared at the other two.

Matt and Adam thought back to their grade school days.

"It doesn't have any sides?" Matt answered, hesitantly.

"Yeah. You start at any point on a circle, you can always come back to it." Eric answered "if we assume this trip is a circle, then end will also be the beginning, right?"

"I get it." Adam exclaimed "We're gonna end at the same place we started."

"Give the man a gold star." Eric mock-applauded

"So you mean...?"

"Yup. We're gonna end this little game of Jeff's the way we started it. At my house."

With renewed energy, Matt, Adam, and Eric left the Wachovia Centre and began the drive back to Eric's house.

"I wonder how long Jeff has been waiting for us?" Matt asked

"I don't know and for all I care, he could've doubled back ten minutes after I took off." Eric retorted. Doing the driving, he made sure to keep his speed at a sane level. One more ticket like the one he'd received on his way down and his insurance rates would skyrocket.

"We gonna do the trip in one go or break it up?" Adam queried

"It doesn't matter to me." Eric replied "You guys wanna grab another hotel for the night, that's fine with me. I'm really in no hurry to get back. If Jeff is lonely, he can hug his bunny or something."

"How about here?" Adam pointed to a nearby Howard Johnson's.

"Fine. I'm not paying for this one, though. I've blown enough of my wad on this trip already." Eric pulled into the lot as a few drops of rain hit the windshield.

"Enough with the rain already." He griped "You'd think it is raining across the entire continent by the luck we've been having with the weather."

This time, they were lucky enough to grab a room with two doubles. Well, sorta.

"Dibs." Adam shouted as soon as the door was open. He leaped onto the one bed and immediately began nesting.

"Fuck. Not again!" Eric complained "No offense, but you do snore."

"None taken." It was only when he slept either sitting up or was extremely tired that he snored, and Matt had been doing a lot of both over the last few days.

"I guess we're gonna crash early. Unless you'd rather order in?" Eric looked at Adam, already dozing.

"Sure. I could use some chow that doesn't come from the Golden Arches." Matt replied

"Adam, you want anything?" Eric said

"MMMFPHHH." Adam said

"I think that's a no." Matt responded

"Sure sounded like it to me. We'll pick up a 'za for him just in case. Unless you'd rather have something else."

"Nah, 'Za's good for me." Matt said

"Let's do it. Order pizza, I mean." Eric tacked on the last sentence when Matt looked at him with a strange look.

Once the pizza arrived, they dove into it. Adam still slept, even opening a box and waving it in his face wasn't enough to arouse him. Eric just hoped he wasn't having another erotic dream about Jeff.

"Not bad." Eric finished his slice and chased it down with something from the room's mini-bar.

"Yeah. Next time we're in Philly, we have to order this again."

"Who knew that they made Philly Cheese steak pizza?" Eric laughed

"Especially in Philadelphia, of all places." Matt broke out laughing, almost choking on his dinner. Adam slept on. How that was, and still is, a mystery. His expression soon changed to something more serious.

"What's on your mind Matt?" Eric noticed the change almost immediately.

"Eric, can I talk to you about something?" Matt asked

"Sure. You know you can talk to me about anything."

"I mean really talk."

"Yes..." Eric replied, a little hesitantly. From Matt's tone, it sounded bad.

"I know you've been a little up and down on the subject, but I need to know how serious your feelings are for Jeff."

"Serious enough." Eric answered "Why?"

"I don't know how to say this, but... I can't get you out of my mind."

"Matt... I know." Eric replied, much to Matt's amazement. He'd being trying real hard to hide his true feelings.

"Oh." Matt looked down at the pizza.

"I am a good lip reader. I know what you and Glenn talked about. You made the decision to sacrifice your happiness for Jeff's, right?"

"Yeah, well..."

"And basically you're regretting that decision, am I right or am I right?"

"How do I explain it... part of me knows I did the right thing and yet, another part of me wishes we'd... um..."

"Fooled around a bit before you made up your mind?" Eric finished, noticing the embarrassment on Matt's face.

"You could say that." Matt suddenly found reading the name of the pizza parlor most interesting. "Especially since Adam has a crush on Jeff..."

Although he knew, indirectly, Eric tried to seem like this was news to him.

"Adam what?" He yelled, then remembered that Adam was still sleeping, not five feet away.

"Hell, it's no secret, although he hasn't told anyone yet." Having already opened Pandora's box, Matt might as well let everything out. "Haven't you noticed?"

"Me? No! I haven't been around much, and even when I was, we were never together all that often." Eric replied "You're not just saying this to get me to break it off with Jeff so we can be together, are you?"

"Eric, what happened earlier was pure storyline, not to mention your idea." Matt answered

"True." Eric agreed

Neither of them said anything for several moments, both of them trying to figure out where the other man stood. Eric was almost positive Matt hoped something was gonna happen and Matt... why else would he have dropped everything to come out to help? He'd been denying his true feelings for so long, he felt like he was gonna explode.

"This is complicated... Adam has a thing for Jeff, and you have a thing for me, possibly..."

"Yeah." Matt conceded

"And what's really screwing this thing up is the fact that Jeff and I are together." Eric sighed

"Sorry. I should've kept my big mouth shut for once." Matt flopped backwards on the bed. "Are you surprised?"

"Not really. I knew that you had feeling for me, but I really thought you were over me." Eric answered "You never said anything... hell, I didn't think you liked me all that much anymore."

"Huh?"

"Oh, come on... when I'm with Jeff, you won't even come out for dinner or go to a club with us." Eric explained, looking over to where Edge still slept like a log. "Amazing." He mumbled

"Look, Matt... would you at least sit up? Talking to your crotch is not the best way to get my point across."

Matt raised himself onto one elbow. "I never didn't like you. I just couldn't be around you like that with these feeling I've had. I was afraid of hurting Jeff if something happened..."

"Matt... can we leave your little brother out of things for once? Honestly, while your intentions are honorable, you can only go so far out of chivalry." Eric grabbed his drink and swallowed it in one gulp. The liquor burned his throat a little, but it made what he had to say next a little easier. "I think it's about time you did something for Matt instead of worrying about everyone else."

Matt thought about it. Eric was right. All his life, he'd been sacrificing things for others. Maybe it was time to do something for himself, though the last time he'd tried that, his plans had backfired. Instead of getting what he'd wanted, he'd ended up once more giving up his pleasure for that of Jeff.

"You're right. It's about time I did something for myself..." Matt jumped up the bed, landing on top of a very shocked Eric.

"Get the fuck off of me, ya horny freak!" Eric pushed at Matt. "This is not..."

Matt quieted Eric by doing something he'd wanted to for a long time. He kissed him. Eric's thrashing slowly tapered off and then he seemed to be kissing Matt back.

"Why am I doing this?" The small part of Eric's mind that didn't control his libido tried to make sense of this. That part was soon overthrown by the larger part of his brain that wanted to throw Matt down, rip his clothes off, and suck him until his toes curled.

Finally, Matt broke the kiss. "How's that for doing something for myself?"

"Matt... I don't know what to say." Eric answered

"Then just kiss me again."

This time, Eric was much more receptive to the elder Hardy brother. A little too receptive, as it turned out. He rolled over, putting Matt on the bottom, and that's when he realized that once more his body was writing cheques his mind couldn't cash.

Adam was awake.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_How will this love triangle, er, parallelogram, work out? And what will happen when Jeff comes back into the picture?_

_Warning... the words "they lived happily ever after" may not apply  
_


	7. Busted!

Busted!

"Oh, fuck..." Eric moaned. Matt seemed to take this as in invitation to stick his tongue into Eric's mouth even further.

"Mmm.." Matt was enjoying the contact until Eric suddenly pushed him away. "What was that for?"

"How long have you been awake?" Eric demanded

Adam tried not to look the "ultimate opportunist". "Long enough."

"Yeah. Well, I assure you that was not what it looked like..."

"Looked like you and Matt were sucking face to me." Adam replied smugly

Eric looked at Matt, then back to Adam. "You motherfuckers set me up!" He sent Matt to the ground with a shove.

The fact that neither of them replied was enough to convince Eric he was right. Which he was, but that didn't dissuade either of them from trying to talk their way out of it.

"Eric, I..."

"Shut up! When did you plan this? While I was hanging by a thread from the top of the arena? Or has this been going on since the beginning?"

Matt just smiled back. Probably not the best thing to do. Eric jumped on Matt and punched him, trying to wipe that expression from his face.

"Hey!" Adam jumped from the bed. He grabbed Eric under the arms and tried to pull him off Matt, but only ended up flying backwards when Eric hit him in the mouth with his elbow.

"Eric, I'm sorry!" Matt tried to apologize, which is very hard to do when an irate person, who happens to be on top of you, is throwing punch after punch; all of them landing.

"Come on, Eric, you're really hurting him." Adam tried again, even though his mouth had been split down to the jawline and he was bleeding profusely. This time he was successful, tossing Eric across the bed he'd been sleeping in.

"Eric, this wasn't our idea." Matt lied, but his options at that particular moment were very limited. Maybe if he could convince Eric that this was part of the game...

"Open your mouth again, and I'll bust you up like I did Copeland." Eric warned him, backing toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Adam demanded

"Home. Alone." He added for emphasis.

"But what about us?" Matt asked

"You're both resourceful guys. I'm sure you can find some way home. Hell, if you can't, I really don't care either way." Eric stormed out of the room, not even bothering to pack, slamming the door hard behind him.

"So, now what?" Matt asked "Got any more of your brilliant ideas?"

"No." Adam said, around the hole in his mouth.

"Let's get you to a doctor, first."

Eric drove away as fast as the car would take him. He felt utterly betrayed by two of the people he thought he could trust with his life. Several times during the trip home, he had to pull of the road, most times either screaming loudly or collapsing against the steering column in utter despair. He'd been on an emotional roller coaster since the trip began, but nothing in his life had come close to the last twenty-four hours.

"Why me? Why the fuck does it always have to be me?" Eric screamed in pure agony. "Am I such a bad person?"

It was three a.m., the day before Wrestlemania, when Eric finally pulled into his driveway.

"Home sweet home." He thought "I wonder if I was right."

Eric walked inside his house, on the verge of a complete breakdown. He desperately wanted to find Jeff and tell him everything that had happened.

The living room was deserted. Eric partially expected to be jumped on. However, there was a gold ribbon tied to the newel post, leading toward the bedroom. Eric followed it and, yes, it did end tied to the door of his sleeping area. With much trepidation, Eric stepped inside. The room was filled with candles, smelling of incense, and there was a bottle of Champagne chilling in a bucket beside the bed. Speaking of which, the bed was covered with a flurry of rose petals.

"Nice touch, Jeffro." Eric mumbled "Too bad I'm not in the mood right now."

As Eric was admiring the 'improvements' made to his room, he was suddenly grabbed from behind.

"Surprise! Happy anniversary!"

"Anni-what?" Eric turned around and stared into a pair of turquoise eyes that he hadn't seen in way too long.

"It's our anniversary, silly. Don't tell me you forgot?" Jeff giggled

"Jeffro, I think you've got your calendar wrong... we've only been a couple, I guess you could call it, for ten months..."

"Not that anniversary, Er. It's the anniversary of the day I first knew that I wanted you in my life." Jeff snuggled into Eric's arms.

"I wanted to make tonight special..."

"So, you send me on a trip around the country while you do all this?" Eric asked, the magnitude of the situation suddenly becoming too much for him. He started to cry.

"Aw, Eric, I knew you'd like it..." Jeff cuddled up even closer than that.

"Jeff, it's not that..." The dam that had been holding his emotions in check collapsed violently. Eric sobbed in Jeff's arms for several minutes, only getting a few words out, and those coming in short bursts.

"I've been an asshole..."

"Matt set me up..."

"Please forgive me..."

"Shhh... it's okay." Jeff held Eric. "Come lie down. We'll talk.'

Jeff jumped on the bed, and patted the space next to him. Eric climbed in beside him.

"Jeffro, I'm sorry..." Without warning, the whole sordid tale came out. Eric went into detail, not only about what he'd done with Matt, but what had happened with Adam the night before. Jeff listened patiently until Eric was finished.

"So, basically, you gave Edge a hand job and tongue-kissed my brother, is that what you're saying?"

Through his sniffles, Eric nodded. "Jeff, I'm sorry... I didn't want it to happen..."

Jeff seemed to believe him. "And to think I trusted Matt to help me with this!" He sighed "I should've known he was going to try something!" He pounded the bed, making petals fly everywhere.

"So, you forgive me?" Eric asked "I'll understand if you want to end our relationship right now..."

"Shh..." Jeff placed his finger on Eric's lips. "Sometimes, you talk too much." He leaned in for a kiss. Somewhat tentatively, Eric returned it.

Jeff sighed, and pulled back. "Come on, Eric, you can do better than that." He returned his lips to their former position. This time, and with a lot more certainty, Eric kissed his boyfriend back. They held each other for quite a while until Jeff again broke it.

"Just one question... am I a better kisser than Matt?" He asked

"Do I really have to answer that?" Eric smiled

"No... you just being here is answer enough." Jeff snuggled into Eric's arms. "Now what are we gonna do about that brother of mine?"

"I have a few ideas... but why don't you just take out your anger on him tomorrow at the Big Dance?" Eric leaned back on the pillow, then bounced forward suddenly.

"You okay?" Jeff asked

"Yeah, I'm fine, but..." Eric pulled a small object out from under him. "would you please keep your bunny out of our sex life? I told you from before, I'm not into inter-species erotica."

They spent the rest of the night intertwined on the bed. It was close to sunrise when Jeff finally drifted off. Eric was unable to sleep. Despite Jeff's apparent forgiveness, he was still racked with guilt. How could he have let that happen? All he had to do was push Matt away, but oh no, he gave in.

"Dammit, Eric, you are such a loser." He said to himself. "You had a good thing, hell a great thing going, and you had to go and do something stupid like that. What the fuck is wrong with you?"

He quickly covered his face as he felt another sob coming on and he didn't want to wake Jeff. He had way too much to do before his Wrestlemania match with Matt and not getting enough sleep wasn't part of it.

Even with the pillow over his face, Eric couldn't stop his emotions from coming out.

"You okay?" He barely heard. "Dammit," he thought "I woke Jeff."

"Yeah, I'm fine." He replied, and he might've gotten away with that bit of dishonesty if it weren't for a big sniffle right in the middle of it.

"Baby, don't." Jeff wormed his way under the pillow to be beside his lover. "I told you, it's over. We'll move on. I don't blame you for anything that happened. This was all Matt's fault and he will get what he deserves tomorrow."

Eric sniffled again.

"I know. I still feel like shit about it."

"So? Just try to forget about it... I'll deal with both of them myself." Jeff promised

One kiss, and a cuddle with a stuffed rabbit later, and Eric finally fell asleep. He was still sleeping when Jeff awoke, an evil grin on his face. He'd come up with a nice plan while he slept. Quietly creeping outside, he pushed his Corvette into the garage and closed the door. If he could make Matt and Adam think that Eric was still on the road, then maybe he could get them to admit what they had done.

"Eric... honey, wake up?" Jeff brushed a few stray hairs from Eric's face.

"MMM..." Eric groaned.

"Come on, I need you." Jeff nibbled at Eric's earlobe.

"Cannibalism is illegal you know." Eric rolled over. His eyes were still brick-red.

"Just promise me that no matter what you hear, you'll stay in here." Jeff whispered

"What's going on?"

"I'm positive that Matty's gonna come over today. I've parked the 'Vette in the garage so they'll think you're still on the road. I'm gonna get them to admit what they did and maybe find out why."

"I already told you... Matt wants me and Adam has a crush on you." Eric yawned

"Well, let's see what they have to say about it, shall we?" Jeff smiled mischievously as the door bell rang.

"Jeff..." Eric protested

"Shhh... remember, not a peep." Jeff closed the door almost completely so Eric could still hear what was going on.

Eric lay back, wondering why Jeff was so adamant about doing this with secrecy. Hell, if it had been up to him, Eric would've confronted them face-to-face come what may.

"Hey Matty, Adam, I bet you're surprised to see me here, huh?" Jeff said, loud enough for Eric to hear, but not too loud that his guests would become suspicious.

"Yeah. Eric not here?" Matt asked

"Naw, haven't seen him. Maybe he got lost. What are you two doing here?"

"We were looking for Eric. We got a few things to deal with him." Matt replied

"Yeah. The sonovabitch stranded us in Philadelphia! We had to find our own way home." Adam added

"Now why would my baby do that?" Jeff asked

"It doesn't matter why." Matt growled

Eric laughed softly. Matt and Adam were so transparent, even if he didn't know, Jeff could've probably figured out what they were up to. The conversation took on a much less vicious tone and Eric was on the verge of falling asleep when he heard Jeff scream.

"Get the hell off of me, Adam... what's going on?"

"Oh, c'mon Jeff, why bother with chopped liver like Eric when you can have a T-bone steak like me?"

Eric scrunched his face. Was Adam really going to do something like what it sounded like he was planning to do?

"Adam, no! Matty, help me!" Jeff shrieked "Matty!"

From the way Jeff was pleading, it was obvious that Matt wasn't coming to his younger brother's aid.

"You know you want it!" Eric sound the sounds of a zipper opening. "Just relax and it'll be over soon."

"Over my dead body it will!" Eric bounded out of bed, grabbing his driver from his bag of clubs in the corner and raced into the living room. What he saw shocked and stunned him. Jeff was being held down by Matt while Adam was slowly undressing him.

"Get your greasy hands off my boyfriend!" Eric bellowed

All three turned at the sound. "Eric!" Jeff sighed "Help me!"

"Well, look at what we got here. One day you're ready to give up on finding Jeff, the next you're his knight in shining armour." Adam stood. Eric disgustedly saw that his jeans were also open.

"And here's my lance. You've got five seconds to get out of my sight..."

"Or what... you gonna hit me again? Everyone knows how much of a pacifist you are. You wouldn't hurt a fly."

"A fly no. But a rapist, yes." Eric swung, aiming for Adam's head. He connected, sending the blond man backwards, a spray of blood from an already nasty head wound covering his face and the floor.

Adam wasn't moving from the one shot. It was hard to tell if he was unconscious or if it was something more serious than that.

"You want some too?" Eric pointed the blood-spattered piece of sporting equipment at Matt, who scrambled away.

"Dude, relax. I swear, it was..."

"Augh!!!" Adam jumped Eric from behind and they tussled. Adam somehow ended up on top and he scored with several punches, knocking Eric into the land of the dead.

"That was easy... now where were we?" Adam turned just in time to meet mister golf club for the second time. He went down in a heap, this time most definitely out.

Jeff cautiously poked Adam with the club. He didn't move.

"Eric? Are you alright?"

Likewise, Eric didn't move.

Jeff crouched over his still lover's form. "Eric..." Jeff shook him. :"Come on, Eric..."

"Jeff, I..." Oh yeah, there was someone else in the room. Matt.

"What the hell are you still doing here?' Jeff gestured with the club at his brother.

"Jeff, please... this isn't fair. You wanted to find out whether Eric still loved you, right? Well, how was I supposed to know that dad was going to tear him apart?" Matt relayed what he knew of the early part of Eric's trip, up to when he hooked up with him in North Carolina.

"Dad what?"

"I'm not kidding... from what Eric said, Dad really made him think twice about his relationship. Maybe I pushed him a little, too, but I never meant for anything to happen." Matt backed away in case Jeff decided to tee off on his brother's skull.

"Then why did you try to get with him in the hotel?" Jeff's voice was near cracking.

"I needed to know, Jeffro. Eric even said it..."

"I know what Eric said... he told me everything." Jeff scowled "Now what I want to know is... why, Matty?"

"Jeffro... you know Adam's been crushing on you for months. Hell, he tries to hide it but everyone knew. He figured that maybe if I hooked up with Eric, he'd have a chance to get with you." Matt collapsed into a chair. "Where are you going?"

"To get an ambulance. I'll deal with you tomorrow. At Wrestlemania." Jeff stormed into the kitchen, leaving a dejected Matt alone in the living room with two bodies.

Eric and Adam were taken to the hospital with a myriad of injuries... Adam had another split lip, a broken cheekbone, and a concussion. Eric fared a little better with only a broken nose and two loose teeth as well as his own concussion.

As for Matt, well you all know how the Wrestlemania match went, right? I guess ole Jeffro had a little more on his mind that night than just beating the crap out of his brother. Despite all that had happened, Jeff couldn't stay angry, even after Matt had basically admitted his role in the whole affair.

ONE WEEK LATER

Eric walked through his living room. Jeff was down on his hands and knees trying to scrub the last traces of blood from the carpet.

"What are you doing here?"

"You gave me a key, remember?" Jeff said

"No, I meant this... I have new carpet coming next week." Eric adjusted the plastic guard he had to wear over the upper part of his face. His nose had to be re-broken twice before it could set properly and Eric had visions of sneezing and half his face falling off.

"I was bored." Jeff answered

"Doesn't Vince have anything for you to do?" Eric asked

"Doubt it. I left the company for a while. Maybe do the odd TV spot, but that's it." Jeff said, ever so matter-of-factly.

"I told you that you don't need to take care of me. I can handle this. The doctor said it'll come off in another week or so."

"Eric, I just wanna be with you." Jeff replied "Is that too much to ask?"

Eric thought... was it? After all that had gone down in the past two weeks, the answer was obvious.

"I guess not."

Jeff stood and stretched. His shoulders popped noisily.

"Why don't you give that a rest and I'll give you one of my famous massages?" Eric winked coyly.

"O-kay." Jeff sprinted into the bedroom. Eric followed, chuckling at the young guy's eagerness.

While Eric got his oils from the bathroom, Jeff sprawled out on the bed.

"C'mon, Jeffro. You know how I operate... either put on a towel or strip to your skivvies." Eric waved the bottles at Jeff, who immediately skinned down to his underwear.

Eric began the massage by drizzling a little bit of the scented oils down the middle of Jeff's back.

"Just relax... and for God's sake, I hope you aren't ticklish." Eric began to massage Jeff's back and shoulders. He could feel how tight they were and it took a lot of rubbing and squeezing to get anything to loosen up.

"Damn, Jeffy, you are tense."

"Wouldn't you be after the shit I've put up with over the last two weeks?" Jeff said, muffled a little from the pillow he was face-first onto.

"Okay, plan B." Eric kneaded Jeff's muscles a little harder, and then a little harder still. Eventually, he could feel the tension start to loosen.

"Can you at least try to relax?" Eric cracked his knuckles loudly. "If not, we may be here all day."

Jeff made a noise that made it sound like that wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.

Eric worked his way down Jeff's back, feeling the stress slowly melt away. If only things were that easy... no job, no prospects, and nothing else going for him other than Jeff, some days it was really hard for Eric to get up.

"MMM..." Jeff was melting into the mattress.

Eric grabbed another towel from the laundry basket. "Okay, flip over dude." He spread it under Jeff's newly-slicked back to prevent having to do more wash than was absolutely necessary.

He massaged Jeff's chest, taking great satisfaction out of the moans of pleasure he was eliciting from his young lover. Working his way lower, he wondered how he could've even been considering not having this in his life. He was tempted to go for the real fun right then, but figured he'd better not spoil the surprise.

He worked Jeff's arms and hands, then stepped back for a bit.

"Just takin a breather." He explained

Jeff put his head back down on the bed. "MMM." He sighed again

Eric applied yet more oil to his fingers and grabbed Jeff's left leg. Slinging it over his shoulder, he worked his way from ankle to thigh. The massage went from a tight squeeze at the ankle to a soft touch at the top and back down. While not really concerned with how tight the muscles in his legs were, Eric was more interested in the reaction of a certain other part of his anatomy. If he did this right, by the time he was done with both legs, Jeff should be hard.

As he worked the muscles of first one leg, then the other, Eric watched and listened. His breathing got a little heavier and there was some activity inside his shorts.

"Enjoying this, little bro?" He asked, a childish giggle escaping his lips.

"That feels great... don't stop." Jeff gasped when Eric's trained fingers reached the tops of his thighs and brushed inside his boxers.

"I know. Just don't get too excited... yet." Eric said the last part to himself. He still didn't want to ruin the surprise, but any fool could see where this was leading. "I've still got a lot of work to do"

Eric teased Jeff for a good ten minutes. By the time he was finished "getting the tension" out of Jeff's thighs, he was pitching a good sized tent. Eric was also aroused, but today it was about Jeff. He could wait... for a few minutes, at least.

"There we are... I haven't seen you that relaxed in months."

"Oh, God, Eric... that was incredible!" Jeff gasped

"And it's only just begun." Eric smiled, tracing a line in the oil on Jeff's chest, down his firm abs, across his navel, and down to the waistband of his shorts. He hooked his finger inside and pulled them down a little, exposing more of Jeff than he'd seen before.

"Eric, what are you... you don't..." Despite their togetherness for almost a year, neither of them had taken their relationship to the next level. Not to say that Jeff didn't want to, but Eric was always the hesitant one.

"Shhh... I should've done this a long time ago." Eric tugged a little further, finally getting a look at that piece of Jeff he'd never seen before. It pointed straight at the ceiling and throbbed a little with what seemed to be Jeff's every heartbeat.

Using much the same technique he'd used on Adam several nights earlier, Eric stroked Jeff's hardness.

"Ohhh.... fuck, Eric...." Other than that, Jeff was unable to make any coherent statement. He just moaned, bucking his hips in time to Eric's strokes.

Jeff's dick was leaking a lot of lubricant, so Eric decided to put it to real good use. "I've never done this before, so hopefully this works." Eric took the head into his mouth and swirled his tongue around. He vaguely remembered what his last girlfriend had done, and tried to copy it. This turned Jeff into a thrashing pile of oily flesh and when Eric took as much of his hardness into his mouth that he could, it sent Jeff to the brink in seconds.

"Oh, wait... oh God... I can't..." Jeff climax loudly, filling Eric's mouth with his seed. Despite his initial reaction, Eric fought hard not to throw up, thinking he was eating oysters on the half shell instead.

Once Jeff's breathing had slowed, Eric climbing beside him, not caring if some of the oil got on his clothes.

So, Jeffro, judging from your reaction, you've been waiting for this for quite a while?" Eric asked, tracing a pattern on Jeff's chest.

"Forever." Jeff cuddled next to Eric.

"We are gonna hafta keep our eye on Adam, you know." Eric sat up on his elbows.

"Don't ruin the mood." Jeff snuggled even closer. Eric in his one arm, his bunny in the other.

"Careful. You'll get oil all over little Flopsy there and I don't think he/she could stand a trip in the washing machine." Eric smiled

"Whatever. I've got two of the most important things in my life with me right now."

"If only you had a bag of Skittles nearby, right?" Eric laughed. Jeff joined in.

"Y'know... if anyone ever asks me again where in the world is Jeffrey Nero Hardy, I'll be able to answer that I don't care... because right now he's right where he's supposed to be... beside me." Eric took Jeff's hand in his own and placed it over his heart.

"I love you."

**THE END**

_Well, there you have it... they finally hooked up! This story just has the world saga written all over it, but right now I don't have a lot of time to do it... I've got another idea festering inside me... so I have a proposition for you Slashdlite... since you gave me the idea of the jealousy angle, if you'd like to write the next chapter... maybe focus on Adam trying to get Jeff from Eric, go right ahead!_

_Till we meet again!!!!!  
_


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